Phew. Not me having a full-on MELTDOWN at 9:30 in the morning because the dentist shaved a little bit of Shaun's front teeth.
Wait, no. That's me. Complete with 2 hours of crying and an email to the dentist. 😬
Look. Teeth and hands are two of the features that I'm really attracted to. I LOVE some strong hands and long nail beds and great grooming (cuticles pushed, etc). I also LOVE me some natural, "imperfect" teeth. And Shaun's teeth were some of my favorite. I found them to be sexy as hell.
Shaun chipped a front tooth a few weeks ago and I loved that, too. Today he went to the dentist to get a different one filled and without asking, the dentist filed the chipped tooth. So then it was shorter than the other front tooth, so Shaun asked for him to make them match (which is fair. He should like his teeth, too).
But the moment he walked in the door I noticed. And I tried so hard to rationalize it, but I ended up crying for 2 hours and honestly, I am still probably not done.
I dramatically emailed the dentist expressing my concerns about his teeth being filed without his consent. He called us. He explained about Shaun's bite and how his bottom teeth were punching into his top teeth, which is why it chipped in the first place. I get it. It makes sense. But I hate that he didn't ask Shaun before grinding it because it wasn't causing a problem and that should have been Shaun's choice.
He's offered to add amalgam to lengthen it back, but Shaun has had some pretty serious dental trauma over the course of his life so there's no way I'm entertaining the idea of putting him back in the chair over something cosmetic. Also, if his bottom teeth are just going to hit the tooth / amalgam, it seems like a bad idea to do that. I feel like that could end up causing more damage.
Shaun's fine with his teeth (he said he probably couldn't even pick them out of a line up, which is insane to me). But it's even worse because I've basically insulted him by my reaction and I hate that. He's chill. We're fine. He knew I'd have a reaction when he got home, but he thought it would be anger, not sorrow.
I've calmed down a bit and we talked and I compared it to that time I got eyelash extensions (Shaun's an eye person), and I was like "What if I did that without you knowing and it was permanent?" He said that he probably would have cried, too. (Since it wasn't permanent and a choice I made, he roasted me instead. 😂 It was fine. Neither of us are super sensitive.) But now he understands where my big feelings came from. The shock. The change. The acceptance that it's permanent and it wasn't his choice.
I know that our appearances are going to continue changing as we age. Gradual change is a lot easier to accept, though. Showing up back home with 2 shorter, blunt front teeth was a big shock for me. He's still my handsome husband, but he'll never go to the dentist without me again. (He would prefer to not go alone, and I would have been with him today if we hadn't had someone scheduled to do work on the house this morning). I'll ensure the schedules work out so that's possible next time.
I swear I'm not a dental Karen, but you HAVE TO tell me everything you're doing and why before you do it. I have all of the questions and I need to understand. As a kid when I had braces put on, the orthodontist filed my fangs down without consent and I just don't play that shit anymore.
