I just want to let you know that we are hanging in there. Shaun deals with death pretty well. Shadow was preparing for it since last week when she went to the hospital. Kira has been through the wringer lately with the loss of two family members recently, but she was with Emma when she went and I think that seeing how peaceful it was really helped her be ok with it.
For me, yesterday before she died was the worst. The vet called at 9 to tell me she was stable but had a little fluid on her lungs. They wanted to call around 3 to let me know how she was doing and if she could come home. I did not get out of my bed even once before they called at 3:30. I laid there, sometimes numb, sometimes crying. For whatever reason I feel like I knew she would not make it home. I know that makes no logical sense, but it is what it is.
I feel better about her death than I do about losing Scooter and Lowrider last year. I feel like in both of their cases, we waited too long. I know they felt pain and it kills me. With Emma her last minutes were at least happy-ish, not suffering. We are going to miss her like crazy and we still have tears to shed, but I am thankful for the way it went. That really helps a lot. Thank you all for the outpouring of love. It is greatly appreciated. ❤
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