Well, I was NOT cool today.

Well, I was NOT cool today. I left the house with barely any gas in my car, left my money at home, bombed the test, and cried. 😭😭😭

I feel like I am juggling SO. MANY. THINGS. 😳

I feel like I am juggling SO. MANY. THINGS.  😳

My day so far:

• Medicated 3/4 of my dogs (as I do daily) because they are old.  Some days go smoother than others.  Today wasn't horrible.
• Made Shadow help me feed everyone.  He's so good and I'm so glad to have him home right now.  He is a big help.
• Sat petrified, feeling overwhelmed, thinking of what I should do next.
• Called UAB because (yay), I got my approval letter in the mail on Monday, but I'm not "in their system" to make an appointment (boo), so 3 phone calls later and I am STILL waiting to know what's going on.
• Sat petrified, feeling overwhelmed, thinking of what I should do next.  Wondered for the 98257358165th time if all of this was REALLY going to be worth it one day.
• Checked Blackboard.  My last Cal grade was upped from a 92 to a 93.  I do not know why, but I am not complaining.
•  There is a breakdown for the final exam now available, so I need to work on a study guide.  Also, I still have a little more literature to go before I'm done with this week's assignments.
• Sat petrified, feeling overwhelmed, thinking of what I should do next.  Looked around the room.
• Dealt with Amazon returns because a seller sent me bad / expired / counterfeit Seresto collars.  I can't afford to be out $150 for flea medication that doesn't work, so yeah.  They are allowing me to return the collars for a refund, thank goodness.  Speaking of money...
• Still trying to decide if I should borrow money from Shaun now for bills, or hope that if I wait until I'm paid on Friday that I don't get any late fees.
• Checked my email because I knew I must be missing something.  Yep, a message from Disability Support Services.
• Communicated with DSS from JSU in case I'm not cool by the time my classes start.  I've got to get documentation from a doctor about my Psoriatic problems.  They want to meet before classes start, so hopefully I can get that and my Student ID knocked out on the same day.  I asked to know what kind of documentation I need, and told them a day I'd be free to do things.  I'm waiting to hear back.
• Started a shopping list
• Looked around the room some more.  Felt overwhelmed.  Damned the recycling that is piling up and needs to be carried to the recycling bins.  (I can't stand clutter.)  Came to social media to get distracted so I could calm down.  Got bored and posted this status.  It somehow feels like a stress relief to write down the things I've done.  Terribly sorry if it's boring; keep scrolling if you want.  I'm just trying to survive.

Still to do:

• Clean my litter boxes
• Drop off the recycling
• Make Shadow an eye appointment (time for a check-up; he's fine)
• Put away my laundry
• Prepare for the Calculus test that is tonight

Tomorrow I go to the final exam review for literature, then Job #1, then Job # 2, back to back to back.  Maybe I can do my last literature assignment after I get home, then have the time that I'm not working on Friday, plus the weekend, to get a my head wrapped around what is going to be on the Calculus final.

I have to get up.  I think I've done most of the little things that were nagging at me today.  Maybe that freed up some brain space so that I can concentrate on bigger things.  I sure hope so.  I also hope that all of my friends and family are having a nice week.  As for me, I'm hanging in there.  ❤

My backpack came in the mail today.

My backpack came in the mail today. Now I gotta wait forever to use it. 🤣🤣🤣

I am dead tired. Not sure why, exactly.

I am dead tired.  Not sure why, exactly.  I only got up early, took a big, heavy dog to the vet by myself, came home and washed her, cleaned Booka's stinky ear, did some literature, made some food, drove 45 minutes, sat through 2.5 hours of Calculus, and drove another 45 minutes...  😜

If my phone doesn't hurry up and finish charging so I can go to bed...  🙄😴

I made a 92 on the last Calculus test!

I made a 92 on the last Calculus test!

😁😁😁

I have made sleep and good food a priority for about 2 weeks.

I have made sleep and good food a priority for about 2 weeks.  Ok, so last night I had spicy fried cheesy potato balls and cake with ice cream for dinner... 🤣🤣🤣  But before that I was being pretty good - I swear!

I still suck at having a bedtime (I rebel against that so hard!), but as long as I go to bed in time to get enough sleep for the next day I feel ok, mood-wise and stress-wise.  I have also been making it a point to not OVER-sleep, too, which is something I am always tempted to do - especially when I am stressed.  That has been giving me a few more hours a day to be productive, so that's nice.  Sleep is my favorite thing, but I am experiencing less drowsiness and fewer sleep hangovers, so I guess there can be too much!

I'm using my extra time to study and get ahead on some things.  I've been thinking a lot about things and doing some planning.  I'm trying my best to be totally prepared for classes at JSU even though they are still about a month away.  It just takes the stress off to know that I'm not going to be running around at the last minute scrounging for books and supplies and parking decals and student ID's or any of that.  If I do overlook something that I need to do, at least it will be just one or two things instead of all the stuff I listed + whatever I missed.

I don't know.  I feel like self-care is something that I'm terrible at doing, and I bet that many of us are.  But there comes a point when you just have to.  A huge part of that, for me, right now, is that I have read so much about how hard of a major CS is, and that a lot of people drop that as their major because it is too difficult, and all this different stuff that makes me think I'm about to be in over my head.  I've got a couple of good friends who've assured me that I can do this, but I just really want to be my best self when those classes start.

Since I have been eating and sleeping better I feel like a more calm and functional person.  Don't get me wrong - my skin and my bones are still giving me a lot of trouble, but I feel more equipped to handle life.  And with that I'm off to do my LAST LITERATURE ASSIGNMENT (besides the final, of course) in hopes that I can focus on Calculus the rest of the week.  If I use all of my re-take opportunities, that will put me at having 4 Calculus tests between now and August 9th.  😳  I need to be on top of things, for sure!

I hope you all are having a great week.  Maybe this Monday won't be too hard on us!  🙂❤

Textbook rentals from JSU:

Textbook rentals from JSU:  $208 and I have to go to the bookstore.

Textbook rentals from Amazon:  $73 and they come directly to my house with no lines.

Yeah.  I know what I am doing.