Non-public addendum to my previous post:

Non-public addendum to my previous post:

I have updates about Shaun's dad and the whole visiting situation.

I can't really remember what I said about Shaun's dad's health except that he has 10% heart function.  I think that is all I knew about the last time I posted (besides his leg pain).  What I have learned in the meantime is that he's been living with 10% heart function for some years.  I truly think that being in the hospital freaked him out into thinking he was dying.  Like, soon, I mean.

Shaun's dad (Father-in-Law, aka FIL) has been having leg pain for a couple of months now.  It sounds like sciatica to me from his description.  Obviously I am not a doctor, but I just wanted to give a point of reference for anyone who's reading.  It sounds like nerve pain that is coming from his lower back / hip and radiating all the way down his leg.  It's gotten pretty terrible and he's had an epidural which helped for a while, but not long and has since worn off.

Shaun noticed about a week and half ago when visiting his dad that he's got a large swelling above his hip on his left side.  My guesstimate is that it's 6 inches long by about 2 inches wide.  He says it hurts (it's opposite the leg with pain).

Anyway, he finally got the scan that he was supposed to have done to see what was going on with his leg.  They didn't find anything affecting his leg and mentioned nothing about the lump growing on him.  What they did see was a tennis-ball sized spot on his lung (oddly, not on the same side with the abdominal swelling).

FIL says he's tired and doesn't want to go to Birmingham to another specialist.  He found one in Anniston (not any of the ones that were recommended by my friends, unfortunately).  They said they are going to treat this as if it's cancer until the biopsy comes back and shows otherwise (we will hopefully know something this coming week).  If it is cancer, it's close to the abdominal wall and may possibly be Stage 4 already.

Shaun's been calling daily and visiting at least twice a week.  I go if I can, but if I have a good reason not to I don't.  We are not fans of visiting anyone during a pandemic, but Shaun wants to go and he is an adult who can make his own decisions.  The only thing I can do is ask him to be safe and support him.  I have accepted this.  We are doing everything else to keep our risk of catching Covid low.  Hopefully, it will be enough.

Shaun was going to visit his dad today, but when he called FIL said that he was in too much pain and not good company so not to come.  That is a first.  I feel extremely horrible that he's home alone and in pain like this.  To me, dying is one thing - it's going to happen to all of us - but unnecessary suffering is something I have a hard time dealing with.  He does have pain meds, but they are useless against the leg pain.  My heart is aching and I don't know what to do.