Today was better, but I'm exhausted.

Get ready for a TMI story.

Get ready for a TMI story.  I was not going to post this because it is SUPER embarrassing, but I'm kinda of hitting a point where if I don't laugh I will cry.  Laugh at / with me.  Just laugh.  We could all use more of that, right?

So two weeks ago me and Shaun took Kira to a haunted house.  I haven't been to one since high school.  As we were going through I was laughing SO HARD.  I was having a great time, but well, I'm too logical to feel any bit of scared by that type of thing, so it was just funny to me.  But laughing isn't all I was doing.  I peed myself.  A LOT.

That was my first clue that I was still dealing with a UTI from a month ago.  The second (which maybe should have been the first) was that I was fatigued, but since that can be a symptom of Psoriatic Arthritis I just thought I was dealing with my regular life.  Went to the Student Health Center and that was not the case.  Pretty bad UTI still.  They didn't have any idea why I wasn't presenting more symptoms, but I wasn't.  So they prescribed me Macrobid this past Friday.

I started taking it and UGH.  I have felt so much worse.  Fever, nausea, chills, headache... it kind of ruined my weekend, but I can live with that. However, I missed a class yesterday and also missed tutoring.  I woke up today feeling super horrible.  I took some Tylenol for my head, sat on the couch nibbling crackers and sipping water, hoping to feel well enough to leave.  NO SUCH LUCK.

For whatever reason, today is the day that my body decided to vomit.  And vomit I did; quite suddenly.  I grabbed the trashcan next to the couch and puked my guts out.  I also peed.  A LOT.

All I can say is:  THANK GOODNESS FOR PUPPY PADS.

I've had one on the couch since shortly after the Haunted House incident.  This isn't happening all the time, thank goodness, but I never know when I'm going to laugh that hard (especially with Kira around because she's hilarious) or actually vomit, so better safe than sorry.  That is pretty funny, right?

I took some Excedrin after I puked and then napped.  I woke up in time to be late to my 2nd class of the day if I rushed.  Still feel bad (just not AS bad), so I missed it.  🙁  I have an appointment at the Student Health Center this afternoon, which I am looking forward to.  I did not make it to school today for any class, so I've now missed 3 classes this week.  NOT COOL.

We can only miss so many days before we don't get credit for the class at all and I'm getting worried about my numbers.  I think I've used up half of my absences for my Tuesday / Thursday classes already.  I have got to get right or I'm going to be in trouble, despite all of my hard work and effort this semester.

Anyway, like I said... I'm at the point where if I don't laugh I'll cry, so I'm desperately trying to have a sense of humor about all of this.  This whole semester has been ridiculously hard... if not due to the transition, then due to the material, or due to my physical health, or due to my mental health.  I don't necessarily believe in higher powers or any of that, but sometimes I feel like I'm being tested.  "How bad do you want to change your life, Blu?  Bad enough to hang in there despite _____ [insert whatever crap has just happened to me]?"

Well, yes, Universe. I want it that bad.  It ain't over 'til it's over and I'm still standing.  Perhaps depending on antidepressants, legit failing a class so bad I had to drop it, hunched over in pain, and in need of an adult diaper, but I am still here - staying the course.  That counts for something, right?

I love you, friends.  I hope life is going easier on y'all than it is on me.  If not, stay strong.  It will let up eventually.  It has to.  ❤

Called the Student Health Center because I feel so terrible.

Called the Student Health Center because I feel so terrible.  They put me on Macrobid on Friday.  I have felt so much worse since then.  I'm having fever and chills when I didn't before.  They said I could skip my morning dose of hell in pill form and that they would see me this afternoon.  I have never had an antibiotic make me feel so bad.

Dr. Kim is going to allow me to keep coming to class...

Dr. Kim is going to allow me to keep coming to class even though I dropped Linear Algebra today. I'm grateful.

I'm home from school.

I'm home from school.  Missed CS class because I couldn't drag myself out of bed in time.  Went to Linear Algebra because I don't dare miss that class.  Found out I made a 2/10 on the last quiz.  Went to the scholarship office for an update.  They let me drop it.  Got a stern warning that I wouldn't be able to do that again.  I wish I could say I felt relief or anything good, but I just don't right now.

I came home.  I didn't go to tutoring.  I am pretty sure I've been running a fever off and on since I've been awake.  Hot one minute, chills the next.  My antibiotic makes me nauseated and drowsy.  I'm taking a nap.  Maybe I will feel better physically, and better about life in general, when I wake up.  I sure hope so.

Emailed Dr. Kim to see if I could still come to class and take notes.  Maybe she'll let me.  I need to be as prepared as possible for the next go round with L.A., for I have been warned that there is no way out.  How's that for scary?

Hoping that between this book and this YouTube series...

Hoping that between this book and this YouTube series I will be able to pull my Linear Algebra grade out of the toilet. I ALMOST bought the "for Dummies" book because that's about how I feel right now, but the advert for this book said that it "didn't suck" and the people who left reviews seemed pretty happy with it. I'm excited to dig in.

I've only watched a couple of videos from the YouTube channel, but it's already clarified a lot. I can remember why I'm doing things a lot better when I know why I am doing them. Just throwing a bunch of symbols at me and expecting them to stick apparently does not work. 😕

(The YouTube channel is unrelated to the book, but one of the reviewers of the book said to watch these videos in their book review. THANK GOODNESS.)

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kjBOesZCoqc

My Saturday evening...

My Saturday evening. I have this Discrete CS homework due, plus I have to get a presentation together on Fuzzy Logic. I really wanted an earlier start, but I was busy napping / sweating out a fever earlier. Doing my best, though.

Off and on today I've been catching up on shows with Shadow. I see a shower in my near future, too. I hope y'all are enjoying your evening. I'm making the most I can of mine. ❤