My Partner

Tired Shaun and our last remaining pair of matching cats. Shaun's been trying to repair / install a doorbell today. That entailed his *favorite* thing:  going into the attic. I've been helping him and cleaning today; nothing too interesting or stressful.

I can't really express how grateful I am to share my life with someone who cares about our home as much as I do. I can't say that we're always perfectly in sync because that's just not possible or realistic. There are days I work hard and he rests and vice versa. I think those kinds of days are conflict-causing for a lot of partners, but he works hard and if he needs some down time - he gets it. His well-being is more important than any chore. Same goes for me. But damn, when we're both working hard on the same project that is so powerful. It feels good. 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻😍😍😍

I rested today.

I rested today. My body has been tired and sore for at least the last 3 days. I tried to rest yesterday but we ended up moving and assembling couches. 😂 I think I'm going to treat myself and do my nails and then call it a night. Maybe I'll finally be ready to do more stuff tomorrow. I already feel better than I did, thank goodness. 😊

That feeling when...

Tfw 4 cats, 2 dogs, and your husbang are snoozing on the couch and you're not sleepy but you don't want to be left out. 😍😂😂😂

New couch.

New couch. Already in covers because that's life with animals. We'll get matching sheets soon, but this works. Pardon the messiness, but we've been so busy with the move.

I love that Booka claimed the lounge. Smallest boy gets the biggest chair. 😂😂😂 We have recliners with seats wide enough that Shaun and I can sit in one together - or not.

We took the rest of our old sectional to the kids today and it looks great in their apartment. Fits perfectly. Life here with only that piece left was not too harmonious. All of the animals wanted to sit with me and Shaun but they couldn't all fit so that was causing some cranky, sad animals. This is better. 

I'm hoping after one more day working at the old house I'll be done. I'm so ready. I'm tired down in my bones. I'm off to rest. I think I've earned it. Goodnight, friends!

I'm just floppy dead.

I think the last few weeks of moving / cleaning / purging stuff has finally caught up to me. I'm just floppy dead - even though I slept all night. I got word that we're getting our reclining couch today and I'm happy, but I also don't want to move to go get it. Maybe a quick nap with my dogs will do me some good.

"Well, that could have been a lot worse."

Today was a little rough. The theme seems to have been "Well, that could have been a lot worse."

Mom borrowed a truck and helped me move more stuff from the kids' house. We made 4 trips to the thrift store meaning we loaded and unloaded the truck that many times. Then we loaded up a giant chair the kids wanted from Shaun. Thankfully, he had just gotten off work and was able to help with that. Then we all 3 loaded up the truck one final time with things for mom to take home. It was exhausting.

While we were at the house we saw my soon-to-be ex-neighbor. She and her nephew bummed cigarettes from mom. She asked to have one of the things we were going to donate. I let her have it, half - expecting for her to try to "shop" from the back of the truck all day. It definitely could have gone that way, but thankfully it didn't.

I learned that she still lives there and is "fighting to keep her house." She said that the tornado that came through recently is responsible for my fence being down, but I have photos proving otherwise. I really don't care at this point. I asked her what was up with all of the stuff outside and she said that her new boyfriend is "a little messy." She said they go dumpster diving and she wants to open a thrift store in her yard because "how else is she going to make money?"

After all of the work was done Shaun and I were in a small car accident. We are fine, but my little Cube is not. She's at the car surgeon getting her face done because it was ripped off. I was in the median of 431 trying to turn into the left lane. A car was coming in the right lane; I saw it. We touched anyway. I honestly couldn't tell you if I pulled out too wide (which I feel doesn't make sense because I saw them) or if they decided to switch lanes / swerve over at the worst possible moment, but I took the brunt of the damage. They ended up with a long scrape and a dent. No one was hurt, thankfully, so that definitely could have gone a lot worse.

Other than that our place is a cluttered mess and it's getting to me. I've been going through stuff from the kids' house and garage and trying to decide what to keep, donate, or trash. I've brought several totes of stuff home and haven't fully gone through it yet. Disorganization really messes with my brain so I feel anxious. I feel like I have spent most days over the last 2 weeks moving stuff or going through stuff. I REALLY hope I can wrap it up for the most part by this weekend so I can put my focus back on school and wind down a little.

Overall I've felt pretty decent, but I've had 2 or 3 migraines sprinkled in. It's like either I'm in bed early and awake early and just running until I can't or I get a headache I can't shake and lose most of the day.

Anyway, I have class in the morning so I'm done with social media for the night. I hope that you all are doing well. Goodnight, Internet!

Right now I'm feeling the need to share some memories I have of a friend gone too soon.

Right now I'm feeling the need to share some memories I have of a friend gone too soon. I can't claim that we were ever close friends, but I think it's safe to say that we liked each other. If I'm not mistaken (and it's entirely possible that I am since this was over 30 years ago), I met her in preschool. 

She was different. I LIKE different. It was impossible not to notice her with her beautiful bright red hair. We played together as kids. I remember going to her house once. That was the first and only time I remember seeing the CareBears cartoon. I know she came to my house at least once. I distinctly remember us standing outside and her showing me that she could flip her ear cartilage. Neat.

Once we got to high school we shared the same homeroom every year in addition to having band together - on top of any other classes we may have had. I remember one year she had these slide sandals and she wore them all the time. The thing is she had long toes and kept them scrunched up. I always wondered if she naturally held her toes that way or if she just really didn't want to stop wearing those shoes. Beauty is pain and all that, especially in high school. 

I remember her goofiness. This one time in class (don't dare judge high school Holli for this - we were all this goofy once), she turned to me and said "I'm trisexual." After I replied "Do you mean bisexual?" she said "No, I'm trisexual because I'll try anything once." I'm pretty sure that was a well - executed joke, but no judgment from me regardless. I remember at the time not being sure if she was serious so I think I said "Oh, cool" or something in response. Gotta love that high school awkwardness. 

I remember her laugh. Her voice. Her manner of speaking. I remember how creamy and beautiful her skin was. I remember being a little jealous of her naturally beautiful bright red hair. I remember that she was friendly and open - minded. A little weird. Sometimes bold. This one time she came to school with her hair done in something like bantu knots. I think people were jerks about it, but I liked it and moreso the fact that she dared to be different in the first place. 

We walked together at high school graduation. We were paired that way and I'm not sure why. Alphabetically I would have been next to who I sat by in homeroom. In any case it was me and Holli, and I had bright green hair at the time so we were a noticeable pair. Though we lost touch after high school we reconnected when social media became a thing. When I was diagnosed with depression and put on medication she was one of the few who reached out to me via DM to offer support. When I had an assignment in college and needed to interview kids she asked her boys questions and recorded their answers for me.

I saw her just last year at Annicon with her boys. She was using a walker due to MS. That was the first time I'd seen her in person in years. It was a bit shocking to see her like that compared to the high school memories I have of her. But she was happy to be out enjoying the day with her kids even if it didn't look easy for her. I don't know what she was like as a mother, but I imagine very kind and understanding because she was always that way.

I'm going to end this here because I want to honor the memories I have of Holli. I have no bad ones, which is not always easy to say of high school peers. I'm grateful to have known you, Holli. Rest easy, my friend.