Something to think about.

Something to think about.

by Caitlin Lowery

I used to be a missionary. I would go on short term mission trips to Eastern Europe or Africa for the sole purpose of “earning souls for Christ”. We kept count of the number of people we “saved”. We put on a play or volunteered for a little while to show our love for Jesus. Then after praying with them and adding their soul to the tally marks, we would never see them again. 

I thought I was doing God’s work. But if I’m being honest, I was doing work that made me feel good. I would volunteer in an orphanage or help clean out a house, both tasks requiring that the people who lived there had to teach me what to do. This actually took their time away from their family or their work. Yet I believed I was serving them. 

Ask me what their names were. I must have worked with and met hundreds of people. Do I remember who they were? Did I even attempt to keep in contact with them or show them that I still care after they’d been added to the notches in my cross? No. Not even once.  

I prayed over their houses of worship, that they would repent and see that their faith was dead. Yet I never once sat down and asked to learn what they believed. Why did I assume that my faith was the right faith? Why did I assume that my presence was so precious that it would change their hearts and lives? Why did I assume that they were lost, living their beautiful content lives right where they were? Why did I assume their lives needed changing? 

This is white supremacy. This is colonization. White people entering a foreign land under the guise of caring to turn people into followers of the white peoples god and life. Do not pretend colonization doesn’t happen anymore. It just lives under a new name: mission trip. 

Do not victimize the missionary that was killed for not following the laws of the tribe he claimed to love. Do not demonize the tribe that simply tried to protect their children from disease and violence. If he cared he would have already known their beliefs and laws and would not have disrespected them. But he didn’t care. They were just going to be another notch on his cross. 

If you’ve gone on mission trips before, and this feels like an attack, sit with that feeling for awhile. Is it good to help people? Yes. Is it good to insert yourself into someone else’s life without asking based on your own assumption that you are the most important person in the room? No. It’s time for us to reflect on that notion and change our ways. 

Colonization needs to end.

Check out Google's logo today. ❤️

Check out Google's logo today. ❤️

Goddamn it.

Goddamn it. After 3 years of steering clear, it got me.

I blame it on the travel. 🙁

I guess I picked up a germ while traveling home...

I guess I picked up a germ while traveling home, even though I wore my mask. I heard lots of people coughing at the airport like it was no big deal to be sharing the germs around.

I didn't feel 100% yesterday, but I went to work and wore a mask in case I had something - because I do like to share, but not my germs. I didn't make it in to work today, and I'm not sure that I will tomorrow, either.

My body has been so sore, and my throat hurts and I'm congested sometimes and runny nose others. I'm feverish and exhausted. My face hurts, which usually indicates sinus problems, but that doesn't account for the other symptoms in this case. I have a COVID test here that I'll take the next time I get some snot in my nose.

I hope you all are staying safe. I know that most people are over wearing masks, but that seems like the most effective way to keep germs down. I wish more people would do it. Clearly just wearing mine is not enough.

Goodnight, everyone. I'm going back to sleep.

I made it back to Cincinnati last night.

I made it back to Cincinnati last night. Traveling feels so strenuous; it wipes me out. I let everyone know that I made it back safely and then went almost directly to sleep.

It was great being home. We had a nice holiday together and I had a great birthday with Shaun and Shadow and Kira and Kalien and Mystir at the skating rink. Then Shaun helped me start preparing my home office setup. We got a huge monitor and some lighting and I ordered a desk chair. We moved a few things around. There is not much left to do but work once I get back for good!

Now I'm onto my second half of this journey:  Getting put on a project. Unfortunately, they are slow to come this time of year, as many businesses are taking time off and have run out of space in their budgets. But I'm not worried. I still have plenty of stuff to learn, so I won't be wasting time.

I'll be with family again at the end of the year, then I'll be back in Cincy until no later than mid-February. Not only will that be the required training time, but our lease here will be up and it'll be time to go remote! I'm so ready! I hear the winters here are harsh, and cold and snow are not my jam.

Anyway, I'm back away from the family. But I'll be home again soon, and then home again for good. We've got this. #LFG

So let me tell you about this.

So let me tell you about this.

Kira is the baker in the family and she asked me what kind of cake I wanted for my birthday.

Ever since I was a kid I have had Red Velvet cakes for my birthday. But Kira makes a DELICIOUS Tres Leches.   So I asked her for a Red Velvet Tres Leches and she DID NOT disappoint! That cake was SO YUMMY. 🤌🏻 I ate as much as I could before I had to head back to Cincy. I hope she'll make it again for me next year. 😋

Tomorrow I'll be 40 years old...

Tomorrow I'll be 40 years old and since my birthday sometimes falls on Thanksgiving (like tomorrow), we celebrated tonight.

I wanted a skate party and that is what I got - complete with pizza, ice cream, and friends. It was such a fun time and I'm grateful for that. 😁 Super thank you to Shaun who always spoils me. ❤️

Here are a few pictures, and a video of my light-up wheels.

My friends Kalien and Mystir. Thank you both for hanging out with me! ❤️

So damn excited. 😂😂😂

New speed skates that came with the birthday package. Can't wait to try these out! 😁

My beautiful husbang.

My beautiful indoor skates. This was my first time really skating in them besides around the dining room.

Part of Stranger Things was filmed here.