I am really fighting for it today. All of it. Whatever "it" is.

I am really fighting for it today. All of it. Whatever "it" is.

I was cold all day yesterday. I took a warm shower and put on warm PJ's. Before I knew it I was sweating like crazy. I was grumpy and excessively tired, so I went to bed around 11. Faith kept jumping the gate and Booka barked for a good 10 minutes for no reason that I could discern. Finally, everyone calmed down and I fell asleep.

I woke up this morning feeling bad. Lots of tension in my neck and shoulders and a budding headache. My alarm went off and I shut it down - telling myself that I was only going to close my eyes for a minute. Thirty minutes later I jolted awake and of course I was late.  Added Bonus:  One of the dogs knocked my phone charger loose during the night, so my phone battery was super low.

Made it to the school at exactly time for class. There was absolutely no parking anywhere near where I needed to be, so a long uphill walk to class ensued. I was late. I hate being late. Worse than just late is breathing hard and sweating and feeling frazzled - all of which I was. Unfortunately, I wasn't extremely focused for class.

Made it through the next two classes despite feeling rough. Decided after my last class to go to the Student Health Center to get my antidepressants refilled.* Walked to the building. Found a note on the building that it has moved... off campus, even! JSU's website gave no indication of that. Made the long trek back to my car so I could leave and find this place.

Found the building (for anyone who needs to know - it's by the Jacksonville Wal-Mart. You enter the side of the building facing the Wal-Mart, FYI). I wish I had known that, but things weren't clearly marked. I found a place where I could park my car (in silver parking), and then went to 3 different doors... all of which were saying to keep walking around the building.

I FINALLY made it to the inside of the new Student Health Services building and they didn't want to see me as a walk-in because "I am not sick." For medication refills they want you to make an appointment. I apologized and told her that I wouldn't do it again and asked if they would please see me. I typed all of this from the private waiting room, so I guess they are. I just hope the doctor isn't upset.

*I got on Medicaid, but the doctor I was allowed to see sent me to Quality of Life for a gynecological appointment. That Quality of Life gynecologist referred me to a therapist at Quality of Life. Quality of Life said that I could make them my primary care provider and I could see the therapist for a reduced rate. I agreed to do that. 

Several weeks later I received a bill for $200 for all of the visits and now I don't know who I'm allowed to see. All of this came up right as the semester started, so I haven't had the time or energy to deal with it. Also, I was already getting low on Celexa, so I began taking half - doses and sometimes taking it every other day. I know it's bad, but I was just trying to buy time to figure out what to do.*

Now I've seen the doctor and she has prescribed my antidepressant. She also said it sounded like I need something for anxiety and called that in, too. I'm going to pick it up and see what it is and how it works. I am so tense all the time that I keep having tension headaches that sometimes turn into migraines. Anyway. She said that whether I have insurance or not I can come here to the Student Health Center to be seen. This is so much easier than dealing with Quality of Life and Medicaid.

I still feel bad (headache and nausea and tiredness), but I'm pretty sure that's PMS because THAT just keeps getting better and better as I age. At least I feel pretty optimistic about my mental health, though. Once I get back on my Celexa schedule I'll be better. I caught my motivation slipping and I just can't have that while I'm in school. There is entirely too much work to be done.

Later, friends. I hope your Monday was less frustrating. ❤