Today has been rough.

Today has been rough.  I'm about to talk about my period and IUD, so fair warning on that.

I think I'm starting perimenopause.  For much of this past year I've been a sweaty mess at night.  That wasn't a huge sign for me - maybe I was simply hot.  But my current menstrual cycle was (I'll spare you the details) almost a week late and a bit weird.  I'm usually like clockwork, but lately the lead-up to actually bleeding has been longer and longer.  Like I'll feel like it should be here, but it's not.  So PMS has definitely changed for the worse because it's been dragging out.  Such fun.

I was never much of a cramper before, but since having my IUDs I have been.  I can live with cramps, but what hit me this morning had me considering Ubering to an ER (because there is no way I could have driven).  I love my ParaGard IUD, but I'm thinking that our time together has come to an end.  This is not the first time I've felt like I was giving birth to it.  If anyone has ever had one inserted and had their cervix sounded open beforehand, then you know exactly the feeling I'm talking about.  (Btw, that feeling is totally worth it ONE TIME for the security / effectiveness of this birth control, but not so tolerable for a random or monthly occurrence.)

There have been some non-period times that I've sat the wrong way and it hurts in my cervix - which I know is not normal.  There have been quite a few times that has happened and left me catching my breath from the pain.  Today was even worse, though.  I'm kind of wondering if this IUD has embedded in me somewhere.  I can't think of a reason why a cramping uterus would hurt my cervix so much, especially if this never happened before I got this last one.

Anyway.  Fun times.  While I was having the doom cramps and considering just dying in the bathtub so as not to leave a huge mess when I inevitably gave birth to my insides, Shaun was looking up places in my area that I could go for help.  I'll be calling and trying to make an appointment this week because I don't think I can deal with perimenopause changes AND extra pain from an IUD.

Or, I just need to find out if I'm correct with my self-diagnoses here because I could be totally wrong about what's going on.  Either way, today was NOT ok and now that I'm working I don't need to have chunks of time where I am straight-up not functional - especially if they are expected to possibly happen monthly.

After the cramping subsided, I slept for a few more hours and re-started this day.  I've been crampy, but ok since the doom cramps subsided.  Hopefully, that doesn't happen again.

I hope you all are doing well.  I'm not 100%, but I'm ok and I'm hanging in here.  ❤

Every morning I wake up and am SHOCKED...

Every morning I wake up and am SHOCKED by this. Kelsey leaves her coffee and sometimes her breakfast on the counter unattended while she showers. My first instinct is to put it somewhere "safe."

I have endured enough kid spills (as well as cat feet and dog noses) in my food and drink for so long that leaving anything without a lid alone is insanity to me.

Yet here her coffee (and often breakfast) sits, undisturbed. 😳🤯🤯🤯

It really is a whole different world out here for me. 😂😂😂

P. S. I love her cauldron mug. ☕🧹

Now that my love has made it home safely...

Now that my love has made it home safely...

I am so happy that I got to see him.

He was SO exhausted from travel when he arrived on Thursday, but he was a good sport.  He went back to the office with me (we were having a Happy Hour) and hung out for a bit.  He met most of my coworkers and had a drink or two and played with James and I showed him around.  It made me really happy because I want him to know the things that are going on in my life.

He was SUPER hungry so we didn't stay all that long.  I took him to this place called Urban Grill on Main.  I'd been there once and the food was good and they had outdoor seating on their "ark" with heaters.  I wanted to treat him because he's so good to me and he came all this way to be with me.  He got a pretty expensive steak, but he liked it so it was worth it.

After that we went to the hotel.  We normally don't go to fancy ones, but we stayed at The Summit Hotel which was DEFINITELY more upscale than where we normally end up.  It's beautiful and full of art and has tons of food all day - not just breakfast.  They had two levels of indoor parking.  They even offered Room Service, but we didn't take advantage of that.  Shaun booked the hotel and travel and said he found a deal for a price comparable to what we normally pay, so that was nice.  He's a great deal-finder.

He was in town for the BLINK Cincinnati 2022 light festival that went on this weekend, but we didn't make it to that.  I wanted to go, but not more than I wanted to stay in and cuddle with him.  It's getting cold here in Ohio which is NOT my jam.  The day temps were pretty nice, but as you might imagine the BLINK light festival happened at night and outside.  I'm going to look up some pictures and be satisfied with that.

We did go to the Cheesecakery (where I posted some photos from) and those desserts were AMAZING.  I had some Red Velvet Cheesecake pops that were just perfect.  We also tried a Mexican restaurant (because of course we did), but aside from a GIANT mall that's pretty much it.  (I wanted to go to the mall because I saw a girl in a shiny jacket / pants combo and I became obsessed with finding it.  I failed.  But...)

I found a store called Akira and it was playing 90s music and had clothing I would've worn back then... and still now if I had anywhere to wear it to!  They had some ridiculously shiny holographic boots and I STRAIGHT UP got tunnel vision and fell over a bench trying to get to them.  🤣🤣🤣  Y'all don't even understand the pull that "shiny" has over me.  Does that explain my nail polish situation?  Ha.

Anyway, most of the weekend was pretty chill, which was nice.  Shaun kind of roofied himself on allergy medicine either Saturday or Sunday.  I can't even remember.  He hasn't been on his regular allergy meds in over a year, but over the weekend he found himself back in an allergy-inducing environment and took more meds than he needed.  I guess he lost his tolerance, but he got a good nap in! 😂

We watched some shows together and ate and cuddled and slept and hung out and it was so nice.  I have missed him tons, so seeing his face in person was the best thing ever.  I've missed the kids and the animals, too, but the natural way of kids and parents is to have some space as the kids age.  That's not usually the case for spouses.  I've been keeping in touch with everyone, but it's just not the same.  I think Shaun feels much better having seen my current neighborhood and apartment, though - now he knows it's safe.  He also likes my roommate - as I knew he would.

I feel pretty amazing that we are weathering this separation so well.  I trust him with everything - kids, pets, house - anything that's important to me.  And he trusts me, too.  And we both know that this is temporary and that it's for the security of our family, so we can get through this.  I am not usually a holiday person, but this year I'm grateful that they're happening because they're going to give me a break to be home.  And hopefully it'll be less than 8 weeks after the last holiday that I'll be home for good.

Well, I thought I'd pop in and drop a quick little novel... so there you go. Most days I come home after work and crash out. I'm pretty exhausted, and this cold weather only makes me want to curl up in some blankets and rest - which is exactly what I'm about to do now. I hope you all are doing well! ❤️

He's making a face...

He's making a face because I'm taking pictures of him (my eye candy) and the other desserts. I literally do not care. It's a coffee shop and cheesecake bakery. Look at this yumminess!

Chillin' outside and waiting for our drinks. Can't wait to dig in!

Look who's visiting! ❤️

Look who's visiting! ❤️

Me and Kelsey...

Me and Kelsey went to a tiny skate park after work. It even had a shallow bowl! But I was too scared to go in it. I guess I don't need to put myself in the hospital before Shaun comes to see me. 😂

I've had a pretty chill weekend.

I've had a pretty chill weekend. I sat around on the computer for most of yesterday. I found out that my phone is backing up far more stuff to my Google account than necessary, so I cleaned that out and changed some settings. I ate cereal and talked to Shaun. I also ate some delicious pumpkin bread that Kelsey made.

Today the weather is too beautiful to resist. Earlier, I skated for a bit and then showered. More recently I felt compelled to go walking around the apartment complex and I took some pictures of the trees and other plants. There is one tree that I think is super cute. Another, I used to think was ugly... but it's growing on me. And some of them are changing color and showing out. It's actually really beautiful here. I do love being surrounded by nature - as long as I am not the one having to fight it back. 😂😂😂

Anyway, I am off to try Kelsey's potato soup. Then I'll probably do my nails.

I hope you all are having a lovely day! ❤️