I think stress is making me feel like a pile of turds today. 🙁

I think stress is making me feel like a pile of turds today.  🙁

I've mostly been feeling pretty good lately - well enough to be doing squats and push-ups for the last few weeks, even.  I think Methotrexate is finally totally gone from my system because I haven't had this much energy since PsA kicked me down at the end of 2014.  I can't tell you why I feel mostly fine because anytime I was un-medicated last year was hell.  But I'm thankful for it and making the most of it as often as I can.

Today, though, I woke up with a terrible headache and haven't fully been able to shake it.  I am pretty sure it's from nerves about finals on Monday and Tuesday.  I've been compiling notes and going over everything and I mostly feel ok about stuff.  But I dreamed about tests and failing and all that so I know what's lurking in the back of my mind.  Yay, self-doubt.  😕

Anyway.  Logically, I decided that even if I make some B's this semester it won't be the end of the world.  It will hurt my pride because I wanted all A's and I could have done better if I hadn't had a month of hell on earth happen, but real life did happen and so I did the best I could.  My GPA won't be hurt badly enough for me to make a big deal about it, BUT DANG.  It will be hard to let go of a year-long streak of A's.  🙁

Oh well.  One way or the other, I'm excited for the end of this semester.  I'm gonna do my best on Monday and Tuesday and then I'm going to RELAX SO HARD I don't even know what.  Maybe I'll cut loose and have a Dr. Pepper!  😂😂😂

❤, friends.  I hope y'all are getting to relax and have fun.  🙂  I'll be doing the same next weekend!

So... when I'm supposed to be sleeping but can't...

So... when I'm supposed to be sleeping but can't I sometimes go on YouTube and watch nail art videos.  I bet that's a shocker to you all.  😂

Well, I've never tried acrylics (wearing them OR doing them).  But I've seen some video tutorials and it looks REALLY fun.  I feel like I want to try my hand at doing them.  I have no time or money for that right now, unfortunately, but maybe I can go to school for that after I finish the school stuff I already started.

I don't think I'd have the patience to do that as a career, but I could definitely see me enjoying doing it for fun or for some side cash.  I don't want to do stuff like plain French tips, though.  I want to do the crazy stilettos and the aquarium nails and stuff like that.  OBVIOUSLY.  😛

I've been trying for several days to get a photograph of these to put up.

I've been trying for several days to get a photograph of these to put up.  This is not the original manicure - I had more stones and one more finger full of hearts, but because I took so long to get pics a few fingers were starting to look crappy.  I decided to take them off and accent them in other ways since I don't have time to make more decals at the moment.  It's really ok with me - I'm digging these.  I usualLy have have pretty predictable "accent finger" patterns, but this time I think it's harder to tell what's an accent or not.  Maybe they all are!  Woohoo!  LOL

Now I'm off to study.  Probably can't do nails again until after finals on Tuesday, but then I'm gonna go nuts!  THE END OF THE SEMESTER IS IN SIGHT!  😃

Scoot scarfed down a can of wet food...

Scoot scarfed down a can of wet food by himself a few minutes ago. Before, he was nibbling and picking at his food and just not eating much. He wasn't even looking excited about wet food or treats, which was unusual. I feel happy that he ate so much. Must have tired him out because he's napping now. 🙂❤

Got home early, but...

Got home early, but only because Shaun finally got out of the doctor's office and I needed to take him home.  I'm glad to be here, though.  I've been out in the sun wayyy too much (in my car) over the last few days.  I'm itchy and have a headache.  I can't EVEN with all this sunlight.  😕  One more day of this crap and I'll be really sick, I'm sure.

So, Shaun got some anti-inflammatory shots and some pills to take.  He did something to a muscle so that's what's up with him.  Thank goodness it wasn't worse.  He's home resting.

Scooter looks the same.  I know that pills don't normally work THAT fast, but I was hoping I'd notice a difference and that he'd magically be all better when I got home.  Life is so disappointing sometimes.

I'm off to take a shower and then, DUH - hit the books.  I'm sadly starting to accept that I'll probably have a B in Trig.  I gotta make a 90 on the final to raise my grade to an A and I just don't see it happening.  🙁

Anyway.  Stuff to do.  I hope things are going well for you all.  ❤

Got home from the vet a little bit ago.

Got home from the vet a little bit ago. The doctor thinks Scooter has Temporal Myositis which is an autoimmune problem that causes the facial muscles to atrophy. That would explain why he's barely eating and losing weight, and also why his face and head look boney. 🙁 They prescribed Prednisone to stop the inflammation. It will most likely make him hungry, too, so maybe he'll get back to a normal weight soon. Paws crossed that my old man feels better soon!

Now I'm doing doctor stuff with Shaun. He hurt his back and is in a lot of pain. Thank goodness he had a fancy decorative cane around his house. I don't think I could support his weight to help him walk. 🙁 Really hoping that my other old man gets to feeling better soon, too. ❤

Made a 80 on that last Trig exam.

Made a 80 on that last Trig exam. Barely a B, but that test was hard! I'm hanging in there with an 87 average, but I want an A. I need to ACE the final!

Well, it's been a weekend.

Well, it's been a weekend.

I'm so bad.  I busted it studying so much last week that I CUT LOOSE on Friday night.  By "cut loose" I mean I didn't go to bed until 9 o'clock Saturday morning.  I was busy binge-watching Doogie Howser on Hulu and painting my nails.  Hey - don't judge me.  I had to make up for a week's worth of "me time."  😁  I'm trying my hardest to rally the energy / motivation to finish this semester and I just needed that.

So I already messed up my thumb, but I'll fix it soon and get a photograph.  I think my nails look pretty snazzy.  Maybe not "I worked on these off and on for 8 hours" snazzy, but it's cool.  I was relaxing and having fun.

In other news:  Scooter is losing weight and it's scaring me.  I'm gonna see when the vet can get him in.  I already did the de-worming thing and his poop looks great so I'm getting worried.  He's 10-ish so I really worried that something is going wrong in him.  He was the first dog to live at this house with me.  I can't even imagine this place without him.  🙁

Anyway.  I'll call tomorrow and see when we can get him in.  Other than that I'm spending my week getting ready for finals which are the first Monday and Tuesday in May.  The end is in sight!  Finally and THANK GOODNESS!

I just made...

I just made Scooter a peanut butter and worm-medicine sandwich.  He is not amused... but I am.  His face!  He looks so betrayed!  😂😂😂

I downloaded the study guide...

I downloaded the study guide for my Trig final today.  It has 25 questions on it - many of which take time to answer - like the 10 on the test I just took.  Those 10 on Monday took an hour and 15 minutes.  I am not sure how I can finish the whole final in 2 hours.  I think I have to go make a study guide and practice every day until May 2nd.

I also need to re-write my Biology notes and watch my last history class.  I guess I'm off to get started!  Too bad I feel like a pile of crap today.  I'm about to find some Ibuprofen or something and head to the couch with some books and notes.  Later, friends.  ❤

So I've been studying super hard for tests lately...

So I've been studying super hard for tests lately and two of them were yesterday.  When I got home from class - late though it was - I painted my freaking nails BECAUSE I DESERVED A TREAT!

This pink / purple / red glitter is a polish I bought on clearance from Sally's.  It's an Orly called "Explosion of Fun."  It's layered over some kind of bright pink L'Oreal that I will go look at and write the name of if anyone actually cares.  😛

Since I was so tired last night I used whatever was at hand.  The new Orly was within reach, as was my box of pinks, so I went with it.  I thought it looked kind of bright and tropical, so I went with flowers as decoration.  I filled them in with white because it, too, was close at hand.  I probably could have been more creative with colors if my brain hadn't been fried from both a Biology and Trigonometry test in the same day, but it is what it is and I'm ok with how it turned out.  🙂

There were 10 Trig problems.

There were 10 Trig problems.  I completed one of the Verifying Trig Identities which is better than I thought I'd do.  There was one triangle that either couldn't be solved or else I messed up.  Everything else - I feel pretty good about.

Now, it's time to Psycho-Refresh Blackboard until those grades are posted.  😂

We had an hour and fifteen minutes. And it took every bit of that time plus some for me to not even complete all 10 problems to my satisfaction.  That test was no joke!

I FINALLY made an A on something in Biology!

I FINALLY made an A on something in Biology! I got a 91 on my lab exam. Barely an A, but it counts! 😃

Now if only I can do the same in Trig...

Took my Biology lab exam.

Took my Biology lab exam.  I feel mostly good about it.  Anxiously waiting for my grade to be posted.  Refreshing Blackboard every 2 minutes like some sort of psycho.  😵

About to go cozy up with my Trig again.  Test at 7.  I WANT AN A!

It's been about 2 months...

It's been about 2 months since Shaun hid chocolate all over my house.  Yet I just found another.  😂  And yes - I'm gonna eat it.  😃

Aww. My spider baby has laser eyes. 😂

Aww. My spider baby has laser eyes. 😂 She is so cute - just hanging out in her skull. See those web strands she made? So neat!

Sharing for two reasons:

Sharing for two reasons:

1. It's cute.
2. This is the correct way to do it.  Feeding on their backs is a human thing, and if you didn't notice, kittens are not humans.  It's easier to aspirate them when you feed them on their back.  (Aspiration is a BAD thing!)

When caring for any animal a good rule of thumb is to try your best to DO IT LIKE NATURE INTENDED!

Rant over.  😃  Enjoy!

Surprised myself and cut grass after tort-walking.

Surprised myself and cut grass after tort-walking.  They weren't really running me all over the yard today so I guess I felt I needed more exercise.  I am just thankful these days that I feel good enough to do it!  😃

Time for a haircut and a shower!

Haha.

Haha. Tort Baby thought I was gonna try to take his dandelion. Silly boy. ❤

I am getting up and moving around for a few minutes.

I am getting up and moving around for a few minutes.  I've been busting it on Trig and Biology ALL DAY.

I feel ok about both tests, but I DEFINITELY need to go over Trig problems another time or two.  We have LITERALLY 15 formulas that we will be using on this test; thankfully the teacher is going to hand out a page with them all printed on there, but we have to know how and when to use them.  I really appreciate that we don't have to try to remember them all on top of everything else, but it's still a pretty daunting test.  I really think the worst for me will be proving the Trig identities, but I did actually manage to do a few of them earlier so yay for progress!

Now it's break time!  Maybe I'll do something easy like walk the torts.  😂😂😂  It would be nice to get some fresh air.  🙂

I worked crazy hard on Trig today, HOLY COW.

I worked crazy hard on Trig today, HOLY COW.  But I had a few "Aha!" moments so it totally paid off.  I'm gonna try to go through the problems a few more times tomorrow and Monday before class and maybe I'll be ok.  I just have to practice and pay special attention to verifying Trig identities.  It looks like a fun puzzle to figure out, but they can be really tough and I'm not very great at them.  😕

I have honestly put hours of work into both Biology and Trig this past week.  I am not even done yet.  I'm really hoping to pull my grades up.  Unless I majorly mess up I should have no lower than a B in either class, but my Trig average at the moment is an 89 so that A is so close I can almost taste it and it's taunting me.  😳  I REALLY want an A in all of my maths.

In any case I think this hell of a semester will be ok - one way or the other.  That 4 week period from mid-February to around mid-March when things wouldn't stop going wrong really threw me off and messed me up, but I've hung in there and kept on keeping on - even when I didn't have 100% to give to anything.  Just gotta keep my nose in the books for a couple of more weeks and then I'll get to have a few weeks of summer before classes start again.  I am SO READY!  😃

It's ONLY (eye roll) 2 a.m....

It's ONLY (eye roll) 2 a.m. and I just finished answering all the questions and dropping photos from the actual labs we did in class into my Biology Lab Exam study guide.  Feeling pretty good about that upcoming test.  I have all the info I need on 9 convenient-to-look-at pages.  I've been working on that most of the week - not Monday because I had a late class, but just about every other day and now it's done.  And it counts as studying to me because I was doing research and recalling how all of the things worked.  Woohoo!

Now to get on top of my Trig this weekend.  If I can manage that I'll be in good shape for both of those tests on Monday!  Unfortunately, Trig got pretty intense so that's gonna take some doing.  But I feel optimistic at the moment.  🙂

Now to go and rest my brain.  You all have a good weekend.  If I'm smart I won't be hanging around on here too much.  ❤

Got in trouble yesterday...

Got in trouble yesterday with Shadow for wagging my tail.  He came outside after I got off work... I guess I was taking too long to get in the house, but I was talking to the dogs across the fence. You know how when they're happy they sometimes wag their whole lower half?  Well, sometimes I respond in kind. 😂  Shadow got all huffy and was like, "Come in the house before someone sees you!"  As if I care.  So glad I'm not a teenager anymore.  I can wag my tail whenever I want to with no shame!  😃

Trig class is basically over.

Trig class is basically over.  We learned our last bit of  material tonight.  We have a test on the last couple of chapters on Monday and then we are reviewing for the final.  On one hand I'm relieved that once I get this down I should be ok, but the test on Monday only has 10 questions so I feel nervous about that.

Anyway.  I survived driving home tired in the rain.  I'm taking my wet clothes off and getting into my bed.  Gonna let the wind and the rain put me to sleep.  I'll take midnight over 4 am with no complaints!

'Night, all.  ❤

Biology was fun.

Biology was fun. We had labs - which is always very interesting. I got home. All of the Ani-Pals are clean and fed. Did some light housework. Then promptly failed 2 times at making coffee. 😕 The third time must have been charmed. 😛

My sleep schedule is a wreck. I got 4 hours last night - if I'm lucky. That sucks because I have to drive to Gadsden tonight for class. I really hope I don't die. I have entirely too much to do to go down for the big nap just yet.

I have some Trig homework to finish so I'm gonna try my hand at that after a shower. If I can't make my brain work I'll take a nap. But I'd really love to feel secure in my math. We have a quiz tonight.

I hope your Monday is off to a better start!

Well I did some things this weekend...

Well I did some things this weekend, but of course it's never enough.  I feel like I'm going to be perpetually behind until this semester is over, which is, thankfully, less than a month away.

I'm having anxiety about some grades, which sucks, but that's why I've been studying basically all weekend.  I am hoping that if I can keep on top of things that it will pay off.  Unfortunately, I left Trig until today.  We're doing Trig equations and using the Quadratic Formula with them.  It's interesting and I like it, but there is SO MUCH to remember.  But, on the cool side I can solve basically any triangle as long as I know one leg and two angles.  I think that's pretty kick-ass!

I did take some time and clean up our hangout room yesterday.  My nail polish shelf looks AMAZING.  It took hours to organize my polish by color, but I think I'll like it better this way.  Fun Fact:  I have more blue polishes than any other color.  Green comes in second.  Purple comes in third.  Before yesterday I honestly had no idea!

With everything so clean and organized I'm fighting the urge to stop and do my nails, but I really need to get back to Trig and / or go to sleep.  I have Biology class in the morning.  I'm drowsy (despite having some coffee a little earlier), but I feel that it's a little bit ridiculously early to call it a night - especially considering how late I slept.  😕  I guess I'm gonna crack my book open and see if my brain wakes up or not.  I'm not in the mood to struggle.

I hope you all had a lovely weekend.  I do feel accomplished despite being behind on everything still so at least that is something.  🙂

I just had to send Shadow...

I just had to send Shadow to the other room to pet Scar. Poor guy has been calling him for an hour. I couldn't concentrate on my homework with all the meowing. LOL He's quiet now, so I guess he got what wanted!

Now if only this one could ever be satisfied that she's been petted enough! 😛

So we were watching the new SNL...

So we were watching the new SNL on Hulu last night and it had Peter Dinklage on it.  I was like "He's so small!"  Both Shaun and Shadow looked at me like I was crazy... They were like "YOU'RE small!"  I was like "But I'm wayyy taller than he is!"  And they were like, "No, you're really not."  So we Googled it.

Y'all... I got a whopping 3 and 3/4 of an inch on him.  I had no idea.  Apparently my perception of myself is wayyy skewed.  I've seen myself in photographs and thought I looked short, but I don't feel short!  I feel "normal" - because this is the height I've been for years and almost everyone has been taller than me for my whole life.

That is so weird and it messes with my head to think about it.  😂  I don't see myself next to people all the time from an outside perspective so I totally forget until someone reminds me (which happens a lot less than it did in high school) or until I see another person about my size and hear that I'm basically the same.

It's really interesting how perception of yourself works, isn't it?

I'm home from work.

I'm home from work.  I feel like crap.  Shadow sprained his ankle at the park yesterday evening so it's been a wonderful day of him missing school, me trying to get a doctor to see him (because I know nothing about these types of injuries and also because he had to have a doctor's note for being out of school), without straight up going to the ER, which is what Medicaid seems to expect you to do.  Blegh.  (Btw, he's ok - just supposed to take it easy this weekend.  Call Monday if it isn't un-swolled.)

I'm off to take (more) Ibuprofen and maybe clean up our hangout room.  I've, um, made a mess in there.  😂  I had help, though!  My lap table had a ton of nail polish and other stuff on it and Boo Bear knocked it over while scratching his butt like an Actual Bear.  So nail polish, stamping plates, etc, are all scattered about.  I still have a box of pretties that I got around my birthday last year that I never filed away, either.  So now I'm contemplating a change.  Help me.

All of my nail polishes are grouped by brand / bottle shape.  My brain works well with that system, but most people tend to group by color.  I'm CONSIDERING doing that, but I just don't know.  It seems like a legit system - especially when you're looking for a color and you might not remember what all brands or bottle shapes you have that contain that color, but it might actually drive me crazy.  I have no idea.  But whatever I do it'll probably have to stay that way for a while because I'm about 99% sure that I topped 1000 bottles as of my birthday last year and I just don't have time for that much re-re-arranging.  Don't judge me.  😂

Suggestions?

I failed every other day this week at exercising...

I failed every other day this week at exercising (besides Sunday!), but I walked today!  Super thank you to Carol for meeting me and walking the pups.  I needed that and I know Storm was super happy to see her again.  😃

I guess I'm off to do homework while I'm awake enough to think.  Maybe I'll sleep well tonight.  I sure hope so.  I've been struggling with that all week.  😕

Almost Friday!  Woohoo!  😃

I have felt like an absolute pile of turds ALL DAY.

I have felt like an absolute pile of turds ALL DAY.

I'm not done yet.

That is all.  🙁

The dog didn’t give you pinworms.

I heard this all of my life - that my animals would give me worms. Straight from a vet's mouth - that's not how that works. Good to know! 🙂

*****

Barry G Nicholls  · Anniston, AL

Veterinary parasite tip #2: the dog didn’t give you pinworms.

I sometimes receive reports that a family member told them that their kids got pinworms from the dog. There’s no way this happened because dogs don't get pinworms. Humans get highly contagious pinworms from other humans. Pet rabbits or horses can be infected with pinworms, but even those pinworms are species-specific.

I accidentally left the gas can outside yesterday...

I accidentally left the gas can outside yesterday when I was cutting grass.  Got home to see Storm starting to play with it.  😳  I got in the house and then went outside and grabbed it.  I didn't yell at him or make any fast movements towards him like I was angry (though I did lean down and take the can) - he wasn't doing anything wrong and I wasn't mad - that was 100% my mistake.  But he cowered down and looked SO SAD.  🙁  He broke my heart a little bit.

Carol, do you know if he has been hit before?  Or if he got into things he wasn't supposed to at his old home - did they punish him harshly or yell at him?  Because that just made me too sad.  My heart hurts right now.  I just had to hug him.

Made a 90 on my Trig test!

Made a 90 on my Trig test! My average in there is an 89. I feel encouraged. 😃 Maybe I can make an A yet! 😃 😃 😃

Edited to add:  AND I just finished my graphs - all of which I feel pretty confident about. And they are beautiful! ❤

Shower time!

Shower time!  I surprised myself and cut some grass today.  I think I needed some exercise.  I feel less emotion-y.  Might have to do this more often.  Worth a shot!

When you're a grown ass adult...

When you're a grown ass adult, but have a meltdown the night before because you don't want to go back to school.  And you wake up this morning crying because you dreamed about Biology.

This is my life.  This is my life right now.  😢

Hung with the dogs a few minutes ago.  Took them bones, woohoo!  Faith doesn't care about bones.  She doesn't chew.  But she did box me half to death from excitement and walk between my legs several times as I was picking up in her room.  It's funny when you're so used to a dog walking between your thighs (as though you're riding her - except that she's too short) that you don't even miss a beat anymore.

Faith has been my clown on my darkest days.  She's so weird and goofy and I need that in my life.  I think I'm gonna be spending a lot of time with her to get me through this awful semester.  She's never failed to make me laugh just by being herself.  I'm feeling the love for my precious weirdo right now.  🙂❤

Highlight of my day was seeing friends I rarely get to see.

Highlight of my day was seeing friends I rarely get to see.  I hate that pretty much all of my tribe lives so far away.  All I got here is Shaun and Shadow - and most days that's enough.  But already I'm having anxiety about going back to school Monday and I just wish I had the comfort of more of my friends around me.  Life this semester has been 1% fun and 99% stress.  It's really hard to want to keep going when you hate pretty much everything.

On the bright side I think I get almost a month off between finals and the beginning of the summer semester.  I probably need every second of that time to gather my nerve for Biology 104.  I wish I didn't have to take it, but JSU requires a sequence and I'm not holding myself back by starting over with Chemistry now.  I can't even look forward to the fall semester because I'll be starting Calculus so that's scary, too.  I think this year is just bad, and I don't know what to do.  🙁

Anyone have survival tips for me?  Encouraging words?  I feel as though I'm having a panic right about now.  😢

Ok, well, the kitty cat nails didn't last long.

Ok, well, the kitty cat nails didn't last long.  The collar glequins and bowtie started coming off, so then of course I started picking at them and just had to take all the polish off so that I didn't do actual damage to my nails from picking at them.  I'm the worst about picking.  Once I start it's all over with, so they just had to go.

So I did these last night.  I showed them to my guy today and he was like, "What made you do that?"  He looked truly baffled.  LOL  Honestly, I saw something very similar in a blog and I liked the way it looked, so there you go.  They used totally different colors and no stones, but as you know I can't just leave well enough alone.  LOL

I imagine that I will have the same problem with these as the kitty cat nails because of the stones, but that's ok.  I don't mind doing one last awesome mani before spring break ends.  😃