Well, I'm awake. AWAKE awake.

Well, I'm awake.  AWAKE awake.  I wish I could feel this awake and ok about it on the nights I get this little sleep before having something to do.  Of course, that's never the case.

Shaun's coming to see me.  I'm gonna see what Shadow is doing, too.  He was so sleepy earlier that he might have napped and already be back awake, too.  LOL  We're all great.

It's been a weird day.

It's been a weird day.  Scoot's been gone a week and it feels so recent and so far away at the same time.  I am still unbelievably sad, and I think that's why I'm keeping myself busy.  I worked this morning, then came home and cleaned the house.  I keep trying to psych myself up to do something fun, like nails, but I'm super not interested in much of anything.  I'm just in a weird, sad place, and it sucks.

This is also not a great way to cope with things, but I've immersed myself in some retail therapy.  I've done a lot of research on gel nails and the different kinds of gels and how they cure, and since I was basically ALL IN at "chrome" I went ahead and bought a UV lamp.  I did not get one of the crazy expensive ones, but it was a best-seller with great reviews on Amazon.  So, there's that.  Unfortunately, my lamp will be here before my chrome powders, but that's ok.  I really don't need too many distractions before my Biology final.

Lame as it sounds it's barely after 8, but I'm heading to bed.  Most likely I will end up awake in a few hours; that is, if I can even manage to sleep.  Thankfully, it's the weekend, so it doesn't matter too much.

Later, friends.

I don't usually like stormy or rainy weather, but today:

I don't usually like stormy or rainy weather, but today: Bring it on.

Just found a tuft of Scooter in my room.

Just found a tuft of Scooter in my room. I can't move it yet. Even when I do I'm gonna keep it forever.

Glad it's the weekend.

Glad it's the weekend. I went ahead over the last couple of days and completed the remainder of the assignments in my online Ethics class. Now I just have to worry about Biology for a couple more weeks, then I'm free until Fall semester starts. Gotta say it's really interesting, but those Biology classes have been brutal and I will be glad to have them behind me.

I think my biggest worry for my last 3 semesters at GSCC will be the Calculus classes. I can't even remember if I posted this before, but as long as the classes get enough students I'll be taking Cal I in the Fall, Cal II in the Spring, and Cal III next Summer, then it's off to JSU, FINALLY. It's taking a little longer than I wanted, but my adviser thought it would be best for my GPA if I take fewer classes. I'm really not up for being overloaded, so that works for me.

Anyway. Random thoughts for the night I guess because I'm almost done with another semester. I wonder if it's coincidental that the 2 years I've been in college have been the worst of my life. Last year, my health was horrible and I felt bad most of the time, both physically and mentally, and this year, disastrous, hard, bad, heartbreaking things keep happening. Maybe if I wasn't in school I would have more time and energy to deal with stuff and it would all seem less horrible. Or maybe I would have nothing to distract me and I would dwell on the bad. I have no idea. But at least I'm accomplishing things, I guess.

Anyway. I'm exhausted, so I'm off. Catch you later, Internet. Happy Weekend.

Shadow had to open it for me.

Shadow had to open it for me. I wasn't ready yet. /cue the water works

This day. My gosh.

This day. My gosh.

I didn't even make it to work until 5, and I worked for about 2 hours. I felt like crap, woke up late, got my period early, and my lizard had diarrhea.

I tried to find a doctor to see because clearly something is going wrong inside me, was on hold with Medicaid for about 30 minutes, and then the woman who spoke to me was a total bitch and hell-bent on misunderstanding me, going so far as to speak about my pregnancy (I'm not pregnant and never said that word once). I just wanted to know what doctors accept Medicaid so that I can get a yearly vagina checkup. She FINALLY gave me the names and numbers of 3 and said that she would mail a list of the rest. 

I went to Munford for the evening after work because the guys had dinner plans and I just wasn't that people-y; however, I did not want to be alone. It was nice hanging with the fam for a bit.

Haven't been home long. The house smells a lot better, so I guess it's about dried out - thank goodness. Now the dehumidifier is in the garage because it got flooded, too. I keep looking for Scooter and that's really damn sad.

Now what? I'm sitting here feeling grumpy and tired and I don't know what will make me feel better. I don't want to do anything or be around anyone. It's no good. Maybe I'll shower soon and try to relax.