Love it!

Love it!

These are really the most excellent, interesting creatures.

These are really the most excellent, interesting creatures.  Please be kind to living beings, even if you don't understand them.  ❤

I just have to tell you about this kid right here.

I just have to tell you about this kid right here. Scooter is 100% my child. He gets his short stature and his quirks from me. So this is what he just did - and he does it every day at this point:

When he needs to poo poo he gets so mad. He faces the door from across the room and he barks and / or growls. He inches closer to the door the worse he has to go. If you make the mistake of trying to take him out a minute before the poop is ready to fall out of his butt he hides and has to start over. Unfortunately, he doesn't usually allow anyone other than me to take him out. But at least he gives us plenty of warning. 😂😂😂

He hasn't always done this. He has periods of different weirdness and that's ok. He's about 10 years old now, but when he was a puppy he was prescribed Ivermectin and ended up in a coma for a couple of weeks. I was told he might have permanent brain damage from that and honestly I could see that being the case. But it's ok. We love him anyway. ❤

Me lately. 🙁

Me lately.  🙁  I can't even muster the energy to go places I kind of want to.  Shaun and Shadow are trying to make plans for this summer, and I'm just like, "I don't care what you do.  Just leave me on the couch."

I'm so sad that classes start back Tuesday.  I only have to physically go to one class a week (the rest is online), but dang.  That feels like too much right now.

I think that I am not in a great place.  🙁

I've been out of school for almost 3 weeks.

I've been out of school for almost 3 weeks.  I had major plans to do crazy things to my nails, but as you might have noticed from the lack of posts, I have not.  To be honest I haven't really been feeling it.  😕

My nails were long and bothersome by the time school was out, so I shortened them and then shortened them again.  Then I tried this nail oil (Bliss Kiss Simply Pure Cuticle and Nail Oil, if you're interested) and it said to go a few days with naked nails while applying the oil many times a day to get moisturized.  So, I did that.  But I was also cleaning a lot (without gloves because I'm bad), so it took a little longer to get my nails to be in better shape.

I'm probably about to sound like a commercial, but that oil is the first one I've tried that ACTUALLY made any kind of difference in my nails.  My nails have no problem growing longer, but they will peel like crazy.  They are also naturally brittle, so will just snap off if I bump them on something.  Well, somehow, the oil stopped the peelies.  Even places that were already peeling up it seemed to seal back down somehow.  And they are little more flexible, so when I bump them I might get a new peelie spot (when un-polished), but they aren't snapping off.  So that is pretty cool.

I have no idea how things will go when I start painting again, but with as many layers of polish as I tend to use I've always felt that my nails were protected by it.  I am hoping that with them being in better shape AND polished that they will look really nice, as well as be stronger.  We'll see.

Anyway, if you're into nails and / or cuticles I would have no problem recommending Bliss Kiss oil.  I am not exactly a connoisseur of nail oil, but I did buy CND's Solar Oil a while back because it was highly recommended, but Bliss Kiss is better, in my opinion.  You can find it on their website or Amazon, whichever you prefer.

BONUS:  It smells faintly like an orange dreamsicle, which is surprisingly pleasant.  I think they have an unscented version if you're not into smells, though.

Check it out:  https://www.myblisskiss.com/simply-pure-hydrating-oil-pen

Compassion Fatigue is real, and it's a killer.

Compassion Fatigue is real, and it's a killer.  You may not agree with every decision that someone in rescue, law enforcement, healthcare, etc., makes, but please be kind and understanding to them.  They really don't need harsh words from anyone on top of the terrible realities they face every day.  The worst part is that most of the people who will shit-talk us won't lift a finger to improve whatever they are complaining about.  It's much easier to sit back and let someone else do the real work.  I've seen that firsthand a thousand times.

Compassion Fatigue is the sole reason I am not in school to become a vet.  It would be the end of me.  I NEED to be able to step back, and rescuing /  rehabbing animals on a volunteer basis allows for that.  Thankfully, I am still here, but a few years ago I reached hopelessness and that was a scary place to be.  The problems that we as individuals face when we try to help are so much bigger than us.  Try as we might, we will never fix it alone.  It is an up-hill battle and lives are at stake.  But often, no one else cares.  That is terrifying and depressing.  It can definitely make you not want to live.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/peoplesdaily/article-3604719/Director-Taiwanese-animal-shelter-commits-suicide-feeling-distraught-having-euthanise-dogs.html

Well, she made it and she's resting in her skull hide.

Well, she made it and she's resting in her skull hide. These are her last three molts.

Unfortunately I don't have her first one. Or if I do I'm not sure where it is at the moment. I guess I never thought about shaping them before they hardened (which is why the last two look so wonky), but in my defense when she would shed before she was always hidden and I never knew she was doing it until after the fact. This is the first time I've seen it in action. I might be a terrible tarantula mommy!

Anyway. As you can tell - she is growing up on us! ❤❤❤

Someone is molting! Anansi is getting big! ❤

Someone is molting! Anansi is getting big! ❤

Turns out that I am off all of the jobs today.

Turns out that I am off all of the jobs today. Woo!  Basically I got a freebie 3-day weekend that I wasn't expecting.  I'm not complaining!  🙂

I am legit probably doing nothing again today.  😃

Getting ready for bed.

Getting ready for bed.  I know it's late, but I'm just now crashing out.  I woke up at 10 this morning, but only because I had to pee so bad it hurt.  😂  Then I went back to bed until 2.  No regrets.

Over the last 2-ish weeks I've kicked ass on getting the house back in shape.  I'm not gross and I didn't lose all of my standards when things got hard last semester, but I did let some things slide.  I still have some cluttered areas to deal with, but seriously - I am starting to feel relaxed here again.  For the first time in ages not everywhere I look in this house is stressing me out.  I just can't even deal when things are not in order so this is MUCH better.

My guys went to a pool party today and I sat home and enjoyed my clean house and my ani-pals.  I LITERALLY sat on the couch all day unless I was hungry or had to pee.  I know that must sound so lame in comparison to a pool party, but I'm really not a "group of people person" and I DESPERATELY needed some time to myself.  It was amazing and magical.  The dogs didn't even ask me to let them out once until the guys came home.  ❤

I hate to admit that I am really bummed that classes start back on the 31st.  I've got about a week to finish anything I want to do and / or relax.  It just hasn't felt like a vacation because I'm working so much.  If not one place, then another.  And I need to.  I just wish I didn't have to work myself so hard that I feel like a grumpy nub of a person who's only major joy in life at the moment is getting 4 hours alone in a clean house.  It's not a great place to be in life.  Thankfully, 4th of July is coming so I will have some time off of work then.  I fully intend to take a whole week off of every job - if not two.

Anyway.  It's 2 in the morning so it's already Monday.  Guess I'd better sleep so I can work some more.  Woo.  I hope everyone had a nice weekend!  ❤

When you spend the weekend...

When you spend the weekend changing his dirt, and also make him a second level, then rush home today because his fancy new food was delivered, and all he wants to do is tear shit up and eat bricks. 😣😂

The day started off hopeful enough...

The day started off hopeful enough and I had a productive day at work, but then things took a turn.  I called the food stamp office to try to make sure my form got to the right person (because I gave him my original copy [like a dummy] so the info was gone if it didn't make it to him).  Well, that pretty well ruined my day.

I left a couple of messages for the guy who was supposed to receive my form and he never got back to me.  I called the office and spoke to "customer service" who tried to lecture me on the meaning of being eligible for food stamps and also who tried to start in on me with that "Your paperwork was late" bullshit.  I don't normally do this, but I straight yelled at her.  I recognized her voice and it was the same woman who's been unhelpfully jerking me around for a week and a half.  When she tried to talk to me about eligibility I cut her off - saying that I didn't want to hear that.  She tried to talk to me about being late with my forms and I raised my voice to tell her that the supervisor admitted they had it on time so to quit with all that.

I love my curse words - she is quite lucky that I kept my composure enough to not use them on her.  I, too, work in customer service and rude customers can ruin my day.  However, when you are screwing around with someone's ability to feed their family that's a little more serious than receiving the wrong color of bracelet or whatever.  Also, when I am dealing with upset customers my goal is to fix their problem and help them - not push them into a rage by lecturing them.  Some people are just assholes.  I was not so nice to her and I am not usually like this, but hope I ruined her day as much as she did mine.  That is not the way you treat people.

Long story short:  The supervisor did as he said he would - which is amazing.  However, I'm getting half of the food stamp amount that I normally do.  I am guessing that it's because I was off for a week and a half.  I don't know.  Whatever.  It's better than nothing and it will help.  Too bad I spent real money on food - including a cheap box of brownies that I stress ate before I rage napped.  Still have enough money to pay one bill, though, so I guess that's something.

I'm ever so grateful to the great state of Alabama for taking such good care of one its hardworking single parent students who volunteers her time, energy, and part of what little money she makes helping others.  Just kidding. Fuck this place.  I never thought it was a great idea for all the cool people to leave this state because then it will never get better, but it's not getting any of my tax money when I get my money job, for real.  I am officially done with this place ASAP.

Just got off the phone...

Just got off the phone with the food stamp supervisor who CALLED ME.  I guess after all of the angry messages they received over the weekend they really didn't want to see my face!  He confirmed that the holdup on my case was not that they did not receive my fax on time (they did and I KNEW THAT!) - part of one of the pages didn't come through.  I can believe that because faxes are finicky.  If only ANYONE had bothered to tell me that a week and a half ago!

Long story short:  I am taking him the missing page on my way to work.  He will get my case processed today.  Food stamps will be on my card tomorrow.  WOO!  I'm still going to wait until tomorrow to pay bills, though.  JUST IN CASE.

Ugh. Didn't realize it was midnight.

Ugh. Didn't realize it was midnight. Oh well. 😕

Slept super late today. Needed it.

Saw a friend today. Needed that also.

Cleaned the dogs' room. Needed that SO BAD. I hadn't put much effort into that room since last semester started.

Needless to say I feel accomplished. 🙂

Just not looking forward to tomorrow. I SO do not want to spend time at the food stamp office, but they are screwing me over. Can't have that right now.

Get ready for Monday, friends. It's coming and we can't stop it!

Watching SNL on Hulu and Alicia Keys just performed.

Watching SNL on Hulu and Alicia Keys just performed. She appeared to be makeup free and is gorgeous. She's a stunner!

As a female who doesn't paint my face - she just made my day. You don't see that often in the media. I'm diggin' it! 😃

(To people who wear makeup, do your thing. I'm not judging you. I'm just happy to be represented, too!)

Aaand... no food stamps.

Aaand... no food stamps.  Why did I just know that was going to be the case?  What a pile of shit.  I'm gonna tear a hole in someone's ass, IN PERSON, on Monday.  I'm going to that stupid office and not leaving until there is money on my card.  I hate this state and it's incompetent, uncaring people.

My shoulders hurt.

My shoulders hurt. Have been since school let out. It's no good. I feel like it must be tension. I haven't been able to relax yet, though, so it would make sense. 🙁

I took another job - for a total of 3 once school starts back and I'm tutoring again. I'm just so ridiculously broke. I don't know what else to do. I REALLY REALLY wanted to relax during my 3 weeks out of school, but I'm just going to work instead.

To make things more stressful it was time for my food stamp renewal at the end of April so I got that handled and faxed in the day before it was due. A few days later I got a letter in the mail saying that I'd been terminated for not turning in the renewal forms. I called last week and spoke to my case worker's assistant and she told me she had my paperwork and that the caseworker had 10 days to put it through since it was late - which would have been today. We usually get our food stamp benefits on the 14th so that would have been great timing.

I called to check in today and got the assistant again. My case had not been processed. My case worker was unavailable. So I left a message on her supervisor's voice mail. Then I called back a few times until I reached someone who could do things. It may well have been my case worker; I have no idea, but she was asking questions and sounded like she had some authority. She said she got my paperwork late, but I told her the date I faxed it and that I could get a copy of the fax log if need be. I also pointed out that if she had it then they received it the day I sent it because faxes do not get lost in the mail. She said they would push it through today and we'd get our benefits tomorrow as usual, but we'll see. I'm not holding my breath. Just tension in my shoulders, apparently.

Anyway. It's been a rough week and I'm glad it's over. I guess I'm just waiting until the morning to find out if I can pay bills or if I have to buy food because I cannot do both. But for now I'm piled up on my couch in blankets and I plan to stay here until either the dogs need to pee or I do.

And on that note, goodnight. ❤

This is me.

This is me (the driver) and it's Shaun's favorite thing. /sarcasm  😂😂😂

Well, I was mislead.

Well, I was mislead.  No Herbst today.  However, they did take off the back half of his braces on each side and put in spacers.  We go back soon for the actual appliance.  Either way - we are still free of the rubber bands!  YAYYY!!!

We're waiting to get a Herbst Appliance...

We're waiting to get a Herbst Appliance put on the Man-Cub's braces right now. When I get home I'm throwing ALL THE RUBBER BANDS away. They have been a plague upon our household for almost a year now. No room was safe. I'm SO over it. FREE AT LAST!

For anyone who doesn't want to see...

For anyone who doesn't want to see the "shaky because I'm crying" version with the rest of the medley. This is Shadow only. Not sure what the quality will be because it's from Shaun's phone and FB also does a number on that, but here it is.

I'm still so freaking proud. I've probably watched the YouTube upload a hundred times.

When you walk into the kitchen...

When you walk into the kitchen and have to text your guy: "OMG. Did you put these bones in my house?"  😂😂😂

Choir concert video uploading now. Stay posted for the YouTube link.

Happy Mother's Day...

Happy Mother's Day to the weirdest, most creative, protective, ballsy, and pretty mom that a girl could ask for. I love you!

It's Saturday...

It's Saturday and I don't have homework. Woohoo! 😃

Well, making 2 B's...

Well, making 2 B's didn't lower my GPA. It was 3.594 before and it still is. (Transcripts were just updated - I've been refreshing since 10). So I didn't have any gain, but at least there was also no loss. I can live with that. I got the classes I needed completed and am still moving forward. I accomplished something. That'll do. 😉

Edited to add:  Forget my happy. It dropped. It's now a 3.531. 🙁

My skeleton is not my friend today.

My skeleton is not my friend today. Neither are my muscles. I think I got too cold last night while I was asleep. BOO. I was looking forward to feeling good and happy and awesome when I got out of school. 😕

NO SUCH LUCK.

Hot shower and blankets and Aleve, here I come!

Got a B on the Trig final and a B in the class.

Got a B on the Trig final and a B in the class. It's no A, but I'll take it!

Trig got me like:

Trig got me like:

"My name is no.

My sine is no.

My number is no.

You need to let it go.

You need to let it go.

Need to let it go.

Na to the ah to the no no no."

Ha.  My brain is forever changed.  😠

I made an A in History!

I made an A in History!  Pretty sure that's the only A I made this semester, but I'll take it!

So far I have an A and a B.  Just waiting to see how Trig comes out.

Heading out to take my last final...

Heading out to take my last final - for History. I feel like an absolute pile of turds.  My nerves are shot.  Wish me luck.

Not feeling good...

Not feeling good about that Trig test AT ALL. 😕

I made my first B since starting back to college...

I made my first B since starting back to college Spring of last year.  It was in Biology.  I'm not as upset as I thought I'd be.  Honestly, I just feel relief.  Relief that this semester is almost over!  From hard classes to real life going wrong - I'm just ready to put this all behind me and relax for a bit before starting back fresh in the summer.

Trig final tonight.  I'm off to study!  Wish me luck!

Exam in the morning so I need to be resting.

Exam in the morning so I need to be resting.  However, I have a very untimely case of the hiccups and of course - my nerves are being nervous.  Woo!

Feeling pretty ok about Biology in the morning...

Feeling pretty ok about Biology in the morning.  Drunk Kangaroos Punch Children On Family Game Shows!  😉

Look at little Anansi!

Look at little Anansi! She's made a web! It's actually pretty big - she even webbed inside her skull!