Nervous...

So today Emma had to go to the vet for her tooth. I had to leave her there and that really sucked. I hate leaving my animals places... it's not like with a kid where you can say, "I'll see you this afternoon." She doesn't know that I'm coming back. She's never been to that strange place before. For all I know she thinks I've ditched her and I hate the thought of her thinking that. I hugged her and kissed her and told her "I love you"... I also told her I'd be back just in case she understands.

She couldn't eat anything late last night / early this morning so I know she was hungry and thirsty when we left. I felt bad about that. Then she was nervous in the car... she seems to like to get out once in a while, but trips in the car always make her nervous. She shakes... she used to shake and drool (drool a LOT), but she doesn't do that anymore. I still feel bad for her, though.

Anyway, hopefully this will all be for the best. She's getting her teeth cleaned and one looked at. This one tooth is sort of brown... the rest of her teeth are white, though. It looks like it might be hurting her and she's been chewing EVERYTHING she can get her mouth on for the past few weeks. The gum around it sometimes looks inflamed, but not always. I'd rather have it looked at than for her to be in pain so... she's at the vet. And I'm nervous for her.

Today has the potential to be super-good... I have an interview at a place I really, REALLY want to work. And so yeah... I'm nervous about that, too. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if I didn't feel like I have so much riding on getting that job... but I do. Interviewing is a nervous process for me... it doesn't help that my boss told me a while back that I'm a terrible interview. Now it's always in the back of my mind whether it's true or not.

I'm not so great at dressing up so I always scrutinize what I wear... but, I feel pretty good about what I'm wearing today. I don't think it's over the top dressy, nor do I appear slouchy... well, once I take off my jacket, anyway. Then I scrutinize my face... too much make-up?? Not enough? Is my psoriasis apparent? I should've painted my nails. Fuck. My glasses are broken and I just re-taped them together... but it doesn't look as nice as it did last time. Damn it. Damn it! What if my lens falls out?!?!

Then, oh then... what if I forget to turn my phone off and there's some emergency with Emma? Or Shadow? Or Nick?? Worse yet, what if I do turn my phone off and I don't know about it??? What if my car won't crank? It keeps turning off a lot lately. What does that even mean?!

So yeah... this is me today. I'm trying to look on the bright side - as in "Hey! I have an interview! 😀" The place where I'm interviewing is somewhere that I go all the time. I'm usually very comfortable there - hopefully that feeling will return once I walk in. Or I might just be wayyy apparently giddy. Hey, who doesn't want an enthusiastic employee?? 😂 I would just say the name of the place, but apparently I'm suddenly superstitious and do not want to jinx it. Do not guess - I will not answer you (until it's over with, at least). So anyway, I feel like I have a good chance of this working out in all honesty. I may or may not know the person who's interviewing me... if I did it would probably make things easier. Or not. I might have performance anxiety. 😬

Well... I'm shutting up now. I think I just needed to let some of my frantic thoughts out... better to let it out than keep it stuffed in, yes? I guess I do feel a bit better. Wish me luck! 😊

[Update: Emma's ok - and her teeth are all sparkly. She just has an antibiotic for her tooth. It was gingivitis, they say.]

[Update: I think it went well! No emergencies, no freaking out... and they want me to take a drug test tomorrow. 😁]

The End Times Must be Upon Us...

because tonight I cooked. ON PURPOSE. And it was PRETTY DAMN GOOD.

Yep. I got this fancy-pants rice and vegetable steamer so I think that might've inspired me a bit. As if this is a big deal here's what I had: black beans and rice, fried cabbage, sliced cucumber and tomato, and cornbread (this is my third attempt at making that this week... I suppose the third time really is charmed. It finally turned out right).

And yes - this was totally blog-worthy... it was a big deal for me. But that is not all. I've kept the housework up and have been cleaning out and rearranging like crazy. I scrubbed the shower for over an hour the other day and now that shit practically sparkles. I'm turning into a regular Martha Stewart. How creepy. 😳

I probably need your help.

So I have this little problem. It's called, "Some Assholes Altered the Drainage Ditch Behind My House and Caused it to Flood Two Weeks Ago and I'm Getting Nowhere." There used to be some railroad tracks that ran straight behind my house and someone decided it was a great idea to convert them into part of the walking trail. So the railroad company (Norfolk Southern) hired some apparently stupid contractors (Allstate something or other in GA) to take up the tracks. Well, they did. But they left cross-ties in the ditch and also a piece of machinery broken down in my yard for over a week - which collapsed the ditch in. So when it rained on July 23 my yard flooded and so did a room of my house... ANKLE DEEP.

Yes - I've been going in circles since then trying to find out who to contact over my damages and broken ditch. I'm guessing that the contractors who did the work should be the ones to fix it... I've called the City of Anniston, they say I'm County... the County says that the trail isn't theirs... I have been put off and put off and put off. Oh yeah, and put off. So I've been talking to the contractors and they keep blowing me off... they told me three times last week and once this week that they were coming out to look at the damage and they've stood me up EVERY time. I'm kind of tired of being nice to people. We can't get our house in order until someone repairs the ditch and I'm pretty tired of my house being a wreck. I don't take kindly to that shit.

I spoke to a lawyer today and he said to print the pics I have of my yard and my damages. He also told me to get an estimate and then come and see him. Someone came out and looked around today... he said he'll get my estimate written up ASAP. But we have to do a lot more than we thought... I thought we'd just need to replace the carpeting and baseboards... nope - walls and insulation, too. He said that if the water was as deep as we said (and we do have pictures) that the insulation would suck up the water and cause mold and also cause the walls to buck out. So great.

I'm nervous and upset... I've never had to sue anyone before, but these people aren't listening to my polite requests to not fuck up my house. The only thing I don't have pictures of is the machinery broken down in my yard... so what do you think? If the property has never flooded before and then suddenly after all this "taking up the tracks" business it does, does it sound like I have grounds to sue? I do have pics of cross-ties in the ditch and also where the ditch ceases to be a ditch. Oh, and all the standing water and everything. I'm going fucking nuts here, people. Is there anything I'm overlooking?? Anything else I should do?? Thanks to Jennifer mentioning it I'm also considering going to the media with this shit. What do you think?? Won't ya help a brother out, out, out, out, oouutt??

Rest in Peace

I chose this picture of Cleo because Shadow remembered that she was a good momma... the first thing he said when we found her was "Will her babies be ok?" (They're grown; they will.)

Goodbye, my little fat hammy. 😭

Sammy, I've dreaded this day since the day I met you. I wish you were not gone, but I know you needed the rest. Time was starting to wear on your old bones and it showed. Sleep peacefully, love.

Li'l Photo Dump

Li'l Photo Dump

Freak Flood

For anyone who somehow missed the panicked bulletins over the last few days - let me fill you in. The largest room in our house flooded Monday.

Nick and I had taken vacation days on Monday to finish putting down the flooring in the front room. We'd moved everything from the front room into the living room, aka: the room that flooded. Not only that, but being the obsessive mother that I am every year after school I sort through everything that Shadow has brought home, organize it, then pack it away. There were stacks of his schoolwork and art all in the floor when it happened. Not to mention that that's where Nick kept all of his gaming systems, the television, DVD's, etc. So in short - that really fucking sucked.

Monday morning thunder woke us up. I knew that Emma was probably freaking out so I went and let her out of her crate and Scooter out of my room. Then I grabbed some apple juice and joined Nick on the couch. He was playing a game and we were talking about all the crap we needed to do that day. The dogs were being quiet so Nick decided to check on them. When he came back in the room he said "The floor feels wet." I stood up and much to my horror - it certainly did. We started looking around and noticed a water line rising against the wall. We promptly panicked. The floor went from "damp" to "Holy shit - the carpet is floating!" in a matter of moments. It reached ankle deep before it started receding.

We found where the water was coming in. Nick went to the door... we knew there was a storm because we could hear the thunder and rain, but we weren't prepared for what we saw. When he opened the door water poured in. He screamed "Oh shit!" and slammed the door. The water was pushing in from under it. There was a water line about halfway up the tire on my car when all was said and done.

We've been there for over a year and nothing like that has ever happened despite the amount of rainfall. The city is working on the walking trail behind our house and I think they may have jacked up the drainage ditch. That - and we have a neighbor two houses down who damns up his yard so that any rainfall pools in our and our next-door neighbors yards. 😠

We spent our vacation day NOT finishing the floor in the front room. We spent it moving stuff and taking up wet carpet. Nick moved stuff and I hacked up the carpet with a box cutter and drug it out. My fingers hurt... looks like I nearly worked my fingerprints off. 😩 The room is still damp, but we used a wet / dry vacuum to suck up most of the water and we've had heaters and fans running in it non-stop. Hopefully, we can get it dry before it molds or anything horrible like that.

We also replaced the weather-stripping under the door. We're even considering getting some sand bags until we can get something else more permanent done. Oh, and we did call the insurance company... my agent said that a homeowner's policy does NOT cover floods. If a pipe busted or something it would be different. He also said that you have to live in a flood zone to get flood insurance - which we don't.

On the bright side at least we were home. If we hadn't been everything would've been ruined for sure.

Needless to say, our house is in total chaos right now (not to mention the yard). I hate that... I usually have trouble sleeping on an average day if the house is out of order so this shit is really stressing me out. We took yesterday off to get more stuff moved and to work on getting things dried out... luckily - we got a lot accomplished. But we went in to work two hours late today.

When I woke up I had a migraine and my neck and shoulders were tight and my stomach was upset... I think the stress finally caught up to me. I called the boss and told him I couldn't drive right then, but that we'd get in as soon as we could. I took some Excedrin and laid back down... my head's not hurting and I don't feel as bad as I did when I woke up so we made it in. I actually think that two hours did us some good... Shadow had been with my mom while all of this was going on and he always seems tense when he gets home, Nick was tired and sore, too... I think we all just needed that extra little bit of rest. *sigh*

Now to get things straightened back out. m(_ _)m Also, more crap from the last few days:  Emma will normally chew anything she can get her mouth on. Over the last few days it seemed to be getting worse. I thought that maybe she was just stressed with so much changing going on. But I checked her mouth... she has a tooth that looks like it might be giving her trouble so I'm making a vet appointment today.

A light bulb exploded yesterday. It scared the hell out of me.

It's been a really fun time around here.

Boring. (Can't say I didn't warn ya).

I've not posted so much in the last two months or so... I've been really busy with all this "real-life" business and I think that may become the norm for me. I actually feel a good bit better when I don't let myself get bored enough to wander to the computer... It always goes like this: I'm waiting for my laundry to finish drying so that I can fold it, or waiting to bring the dogs back in, or waiting for SOMETHING to do, and so I think "Well, let me check my email / myspace / other things I like to read / etc. Then I get sucked in and put a bunch of things off. Then it all piles up and I get all frazzled and crazy because I hate it when things pile up and then I rush around to get it all done. Moderation is the key here and I suck so horribly at it. I'm an all-or-nothing kind of girl... I don't want to start something today and finish it tomorrow. Too bad that goes for things like reading blogs or eating all the ice cream instead of JUST the things I really need to do. Oh well. That gives me something to work on, I suppose. Anyone know of a way to hurry up and be good at moderation?? 😜😁

Before I forget let me mention something about my last blog... only one person commented it which is fine. I have a feeling that it had something to do with the video being so long and also the political nature of it. Psh... I still don't know much about politics, but I'm learning. Mostly, what I was trying to convey is that Jello Biafra opened my eyes and made me care about something I should've cared about all along. I know we're not all going to agree with each other's views on politics and everyone has their reasons for believing what they do. I hate to admit it, but I've never cared enough to have a "side" and I'm really glad that's not the case anymore. I'm not saying that I do have a side (I don't know enough about anything to have a side at this point) - I'm just saying that I am (for once in my life) paying attention. It feels nice to finally have my head out of the sand.

Anyway, here's what all I've been up to:

I recently removed most of the carpet in my bedroom. I left a square because I EXTREMELY didn't want to move my computer armoire, nor unhook, remove, and re-hook the computer and all the other stuff back up inside it just to get that piece up. Not only that, but my little Scooty likes to hang out under the chair that goes with my armoire so I left him a little to lay on under there. So now I have this really 70s-looking linoleum in my bedroom (it's orangey brown-yellow... sort of like this blog). It's not in bad shape; it has some paint on it, but I'm not worried about that for now. I'm thinking I'll probably paint my room before I put new flooring down, anyway. Also, the linoleum is a LOT easier to clean up when Scooter pees. And yes, unfortunately, he still pees in the floor. I bought him a litter box, thinking that he'd use it. But no. The sound of the dog-litter when he steps on it scares the shit out of him (of course).

More on that... never in my life have I lived with a dog in the house until I got the two I have now. My mother would not allow it although I would've loved to have a dog indoors with me growing up. So Scooter was a first for me. When we first got him he did really well with his housetraining. But then he ended up in the hospital for about a week with Ivermectin (a vet-prescribed drug) in his central nervous system. On top of that he was on morphine for several of those days to control the seizures. To make a long story short:  My little fuzzy boy has never been quite the same. When we first brought him home he had to be in a crate with a pan in the bottom to keep him from having to lay in his own waste all day (he still couldn't walk). It was rough. It's been just over a year since all that and we've never been able to get him housetrained again. He still seems smart - just weird. He WILL go outside, but I'm pretty sure he can't hold it as long as he was once able to and that's where the problem is.

Since I'm not willing to throw him out I thought a litter box might help him. But that's not going to work. When I sit him in there he just tenses up and breathes really shallowly. The sound of the litter scares the hell out of him and I don't have the heart to keep putting him in there. Same thing with the floor... if his nails click too loudly when he walks he'll panic and run backwards and fall. I mentioned it in a previous blog, but we're not really sure if he can see. The vet said that they were not positive he'd make a full recovery and I'm starting to think that he hasn't.

I guess my next course of action for Scooter will be puppy pads... he did ok with those way back when - he just liked to shred them. I'm going to get one of those things that hold them down and see if that helps. So, anyone need a dog litter box?? They're supposedly great for smaller (less neurotic) dogs... I ordered Scoot's off the internet because PetSmart didn't have his size. His is for dogs up to 35 pounds. I'd get rid of it and the rest of the litter for $15 (I paid $30 for it) and it's never even been used. If you're interested check it out here so that you know what I'm talking about.

Anyway, we saw Transformers today. It was really good. I'm not much of a movie-goer, but it actually kept my attention the whole time. Also, we went and paid for the flooring for the front room... it's this really pretty red wood flooring. It'll be available for us to pick up Tuesday. I'm excited about putting it down. There's carpet in that room, for now. Emma chewed up a purple bottle of paint on it about two months ago and the other night she ate my green ink pen on it. Not to mention that Scooter pees on it regularly. So yeah... I'll probably start pulling that up this week. Carpet just doesn't work for our lifestyle. Much like hair and fingernails I feel dirty just having it around.

And so... I guess that's all.