About fucking myself...

Normally when I'm concerned about something I keep it to myself (and maybe the few people closest to me). I have this bizarre fear that throwing it out into the universe will make things worse somehow. So, sharing this with you all is kind of not what I would normally do. But, I don't really believe that things could get much fucked-er, so why not?

If you don't know about this then the rest of this blog probably won't matter much to you. Or make any sense.

So, I filed a suit against the railroad companies and contractor (FINALLY). There are 3 that we're going after: Norfolk Southern, the railroad company, A & K Railroad (who are tied to Norfolk Southern somehow) and AllState Contractors (who did some of the work). Well, A & K Railroad wanted to settle for $5000 (half of what the lawyer is suing for), and at first I was going to take it. I was supposed to go sign the papers yesterday.

But then, it started raining.

Upon hearing the rain I looked out of the window at work and my stomach promptly tied itself in knots. This happens EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME IT RAINS ever since my house flooded. I panic because I never know if the water is going to come into my home again or just turn my yard into a swamp (like either of those are desirable options). And then I realized something:  The money wasn't going to fix the problem. Hell, after my lawyer's cut it wouldn't have even covered the damage done to my house. So I declined to settle for that.

I could tell that I upset my lawyer... he had the papers and the checks and everything right there waiting for me to sign. I'm so ready for all of this to be over with, but there's no point in fixing my home if I have to live in fear that it will flood again. So the lawyer says I should take some of that money and stop the flooding. Well, then what about my house? I didn't cause any of this. I really don't feel that I should be expected to come out of my pocket to fix someone else's mistake (not that I will ever have the money to).

I don't know. All I've asked is for the $5000 and for them to dig the ditch back out. I would be comfortable settling for that. If they won't do that then I have to decide whether to take the $5000 (which really comes out to be $2948 for me while the damage done to my home was estimated at $3200 - not to mention I'm out $200 in filing fees) and walk away or take this to court. And I'm not all that much of a gambler, but I really feel like I have a case. I mean, what idiot can't see that the "drainage ditch" is draining into my yard - not the other way around? I do have witnesses who have lived near this property for 20+ years who say this has never happened before, not to mention that I was here a year with no problems before the construction began.

Besides, who would want to live with this? (And yes, it's recent).

  

For me and you: My favorite juice recipes!

I keep discovering new ones so maybe I'll keep this updated. I've found so many good ones that I don't want to forget them. AND (although most of my friends are like, "Dude, you've lost it") a couple of people have actually expressed interest in my juicing - so that's all of the encouragement I needed. 😀 Here you go! Try to keep up with my really precise measurements, mmmk?

1)

1/2 bag of baby spinach

2 small apples

4 regular carrots

When I'm trying to be SUPER-DUPER healthy I add in about a quarter of a beet and about 2 hands full of either black seedless grapes OR strawberries. It really takes the edge off the beet.

2)

4 carrots

2 small apples

1 hand full of strawberries

3)

4 carrots

2 small apples

1 pinch of ginger

4)

4 carrots

2 hands full of black grapes

That's all I've got so far. I'm expanding - slowly but surely. I just needed to start with things that I'm familiar with and that were pretty simple.

Also, anything like just plain apple or orange is really delicious... SO much better than anything you could buy in a store.

ALSO, Janet, if you read this: Do you happen to remember what you juiced at my house that night? Some weird thing... grapes and blueberries? I can't remember, but it was nice and sweet. 😊

Killing time while digesting. (Part 2)

There are a few new things with me.  First of all we have kittens.  They're pretty much Shadows and he's doing an excellent job caring for them.  Of course they both just found their way to me... spoke to me - I guess you could say.  I didn't plan to keep the first one, but Shadow really wanted her.  She's solid black and her name is Midna.  He promised that he would take care of her so I was like, "Well, ok."  Shortly after we fed her that first night I found her curled up in Shadow's lap asleep.  He was all, "I sang her to sleep."  Who could say no to that?!?

We ended up getting her a friend from my mother (because she was driving me [and the guinea pigs] CRAZY! - ever try to sleep with a kitten slicing you up?)  She just needed some companionship and someone to tire herself out with.  So her friend is solid gray and her name is Twilight.  They make a good pair.  I've had mixed feelings about having them around (one isn't consistently using the litter box and one of my dogs literally begins to water at the mouth when they come near her), but I think things will smooth out.  We're just having to be careful right now is all.

Well, I guess all of the news is not happy news.  Stella passed away last week and I'm really unsure why.  She was doing fine and then BAM! she was dead.  😢  It just made me sick.  Literally I felt nauseated.  Stella was too sweet.  I think anyone who's ever met her has at least teared up when they found out.  She was just a doll.

Aside from that things have been pretty good.  Moved things in the house around a bit and I think it looks nice.  Now I have a lot more space in my bedroom and now that the computer isn't in there I'm just less drawn to it.  The computer is really close to the dogs' room so when I'm sitting here ignoring them I feel really bad.  And then I get off my ass and go love on them.  I guess that's one way to keep my internet usage in check.  😂

Anyway, I think I'm done digesting my juice.  I have to pee like you wouldn't believe.  So I guess that's a good enough reason to get up and get moving.  😂

I hope everyone is doing well.  ❤

Killing time while digesting. (Part 1)

Yep, that's right. DIGESTING. I'm pretty full and don't exactly want to get up and do the things I need to do just yet so I thought I'd kill some time on myspace. I haven't been around much. I'm ok with that, but no harm in checking in every now and then. I noticed that they've done some upgrading on the messaging and stuff... it sucks that they JUST NOW got all the fancy messaging shit going. Because now I pretty much never use it, but I used to a lot. I DO NOT care for the whole "sending groups of people you never talk to chain messages" thing, though. Gross.

Shaun (and me - to a lesser extent) put the hall floor down. It looks AWESOME. I should post pictures, but I'm just not right now. If anyone wants to see it that bad you should just come and visit me. That is what I think. I might even let you walk on it. 😜

Also, we moved things in the house around a bit and I think it looks nice. Now I have a lot more space in my bedroom and now that the computer isn't in there I'm just less drawn to it. The computer is really close to the dogs' room so when I'm sitting here ignoring them I feel really bad. And then I get off my ass and go love on them. I guess that's one way to keep my internet usage in check. 😂

Shadow started 4th grade on Monday. So he's old. Yeah - Middle School next year. Time flies.

I bought a juicer a couple of weeks ago and I LOVE that thing. I'm having spinach / apple / carrot juice every morning and usually a glass of orange juice. Orange and apple juice - for the record - tastes SO MUCH YUMMIER when it is not store-bought. You won't find anything like this packaged. Another juice that is really tasty is carrot / apple / strawberry. I know some of this might sound really gross, but it's not. It is the complete opposite of gross, for realz. Come over one day and I'll make you some. I decided to get a juicer for my health (namely, my skin). I've read a lot about certain vegetables (that I would probably never really eat) being good for psoriasis and so now I'm juicing them. If you add fruit juice to juiced vegetables that you don't really like it changes the taste completely. I've gone through 3 bags of oranges, 3 bags of apples, 5 bags of baby spinach, 1 bag of carrots, and 1 container of strawberries in a week. That's more produce than I usually get in months.

My skin - for the record - is a little better. But I need to start juicing beets and adding that to the mix. I hear that it's one I'm going to need a lot of. So it's a learning process and whatnot. Aside from my skin I feel pretty good. Juice gives me tons of energy and not like the rise and crash of caffeine. If feels different - in a good way. I've also lost some squish... I don't have any idea if it even equals up to a pound (nor do I care) - I'm just saying that it's something I've noticed. So no complaints there. I'm actually considering trying to go mostly raw by the end of the year... currently, I'm only eating like, 1 cooked meal per day. Sometimes more, but not always. I've noticed that the more I eat raw veggies and stuff like that (and the more juice I drink) the more of that I want. So it's interesting how that affects you.

Why, hello there. (Part 2)

A couple of weeks ago I got a phone call from a friend... her husband had run over a rabbit hutch with the lawn mower and there were babies in it. 😭 One died instantly, but there were 3 left. Of course I took them. They looked to be about a week old - they still had their eyes shut and everything. Despite me and Shaun reading up and doing our best to be good bunny parents they all died within a week. 😟

One acted strange from the start... it seemed like that one might have had internal injuries or was just traumatized. It was the first one to die. The second one I thought was probably ok, but it wasn't as curious or aware as the third. It died next. The curious one did really well for most of the week and I actually thought that one might make it... however, we were not so lucky.

From all of the reading I've done online baby bunnies are REALLY hard to keep alive. But AMC wouldn't take them unless they were really sick or obviously injured and the last time I spoke with the museum they said that they didn't do much rehabbing these days so I thought I'd give it my best shot. My main problem was getting them to poop... gosh, I really can't tell you how much time I spent wiping bunny ass. It was a lot, though. Anyway, they were really cute. This is Noggin, the last one to go. Here is a video:

Why, hello there. (Part 1)

Well it's been a while. Real life has yet again sucked me in. Speaking of not being around the 'space much let me know if you want my email address. I check it daily, usually. But I won't give it to you unless you PROMISE to not spam me with BS chain letters, political junk, or "Jesus loves you" shit. You can only write me if you're writing ONLY to me because you have something to say. Deal? 

Overall things have been good for me. I'm happy. But that's not to say that there hasn't been some negative thrown into the mix just for good measure. For instance: Take nine people who all have issues and dislike each other, throw them into a small house together, let it fester in the heat for a few months and what do you get? My neighbors!

Yeah, I've had a lot of trouble with those people since I've lived here. They just can't seem to get their shit together. Aside from the animals and the nine-year-old that they don't take care of (who has fortunately moved out), most of the drama stays contained over there. But when you bring a strange man into the home and he starts assaulting the teenage girl in the house (who I happen to care something about), that's just not cool. So then I do what I think is best and then she ends up placed here by DHR for a weekend.

She knows I love her and that I'm here for her, but it was kind of a disaster and I'm glad to have my house back to myself. I think I've learned that either A) I'm not ready to share my living space with another person yet, or B) I can only share my living space with specific people. I think it leans more towards B because some people I can have around for days on end with no problem, but they are rare. 😂

Aside from all of that I've been up to making button barrettes. It's fun and it keeps me busy. This is a picture of my first batch:

If anyone out there wants to donate any old buttons to the cause I'd love to have them. I'm not selling them or anything (although I've been told that I should). I guess I'm just pretty much doing it for fun and because now I have hair to put them in. 😀 Yeah, I know that I'm goofy. Anyway, what's been up with you peoples?

P. S. Meet Big Al:

Forgive me.

I just woke up. I haven't been sleeping well as of late... I've had a lot of things going on and life has taken a turn for the stressful at this moment. I haven't spent a ton of time on myspace lately, but I'd planned to at least log in and acknowledge the mom's on their day and that just didn't get to happen. You were all in my thoughts; however, I haven't quite learned how to send those yet so you didn't know it. In any case, Happy Belated Mother's Day. I feel so lame for that. Also, thank you to everyone who thought of me.

Well, I don't really care to go into much detail (as the situation is sad and I should really try to get back to sleep), but my grandfather passed away on Sunday. He was pretty much the backbone of the family and things are just... not good right now. I guess that's to be expected. I really regret that I didn't have more time with him, but some things are out of your control - especially when you are a child. I really enjoyed the time I did have with him in more recent years, though, and I am thankful to have at least had that.

For anyone who feels neglected or upset with me due to my absence here or in person:  I'm sorry. I've really had a lot going on and sometimes there is just not enough of me to go around.

Love to you all,

Blu