When I say that I love it here...

When I say that I love it here...

I 👏🏻 FUCK 👏🏻 ING 👏🏻 LOVE 👏🏻 IT 👏🏻 HERE👏🏻.

I'm about to sign myself up for this.

https://www.abqjournal.com/2498866/calling-all-kitten-cuddlers-city-launches-new-nursery.html

Edited to add: If you don't want to read it the high points are:

•  The city spent $14,000 on an animal nursery
•  They are training volunteers to help raise orphaned puppies and kittens
•  They bought incubators for the babies and massage chairs for the volunteers

It's definitely been a low-energy few days for me.

I'm about to start responding to comments.  I'm sorry for being away, but I needed some time to get right.  I have to deal with Happy Tails Lost & Found Pets of Calhoun County whether I feel like it or not so I'm technically "on here" lurking even if I don't have the energy to post or respond.  It's definitely been a low-energy few days for me.

We're all doing as ok as we can.  I had to move a giant pack of toilet paper that was delivered and left in the middle of the dining room floor because twice upon glancing at it I thought it was Rose standing there awkwardly, as she often did.  Cubba seems to notice that she's missing, as well.  Shaun, despite definitively being a "cat person" was basically claimed by both Cubba and Rose so it's hitting him a bit harder than the rest of us.  He was her comfort person and that meant something.

I'm not saying that losing her wasn't painful for me or the kids because it was, but she was a hard creature to connect with.  It almost always felt like she was putting up with your attention / affection if it didn't outright scare her away.  She also hadn't been fond of me since the vet visit where we discovered her tumor so I've been avoided for all of this time unless she wanted to play.  I miss those big, doofy play bows, though.  Almost every morning she was ready to go out back and play.

Today Shaun helped me go through my plants to see who was alive or not.  He also helped me get most of them watered.  We did some light housework because our solar panels are being installed tomorrow and the workers will need to come in to gain access to the attic.  Other than that I painted Shaun's nails (black with magnetic silver gel polish) and they look kind of like moons.  He likes them.  At times like these taking care of each other is important.  I think we both did a good job of that today.  ❤

I've complained...

I've complained about how Facebook changed the way public groups work and I stand by that. They've tried to make it easier with this "auto-mod" thing you can set up, but the issue with that is that sometimes things that are harmless or even helpful to the group get denied by it. Then I have to go behind it and double check everything it does. This is a new way of doing things and I haven't yet remembered to check the auto-mod's work daily.

So this person is (understandably) upset that her comments and posts are being denied. She has chosen to speak to me by posting posts that I will deny even though I've tried messaging her and even responded in my "declined post" feedback letting her know that I've messaged her and where to find it.

If she read my message at all she would know that I'm trying to help. Instead, I believe it was ignored or that she blocked me because I can't respond to it. Also, this was the last post she tried to post in Happy Tails... Even though I never told her "Bye."

When I tell you the struggle to maintain this group is real... It's not a joke. And this was a relatively benign interaction because I wasn't verbally abused - just misunderstood with an attitude. So much fun.

It looks like FB finally worked out some glitches...

It looks like FB finally worked out some glitches regarding public groups. I'm no longer showing a backlog of 200+ posts and participation requests in Happy Tails Lost & Found Pets of Calhoun County! 

Sweet relief!

How is this for a 10 year challenge?

How is this for a 10 year challenge?  I created this group from scratch exactly 10 years ago today.  It has grown to over 12,500 members and helped at least a few pets get home over the years; I know this because I personally got involved at times.  Other times the communities and neighborhoods stepped up and made all of the difference.

For anyone who is unaware - running a group can be a JOB.  Unpaid.  Often thankless.  People get angry when they can't just post whatever they want.  They will get nasty and message you slinging insults.  I've been called both a Democrat and a Trump supporter by different people trying to get a rise out of me.  😂😂😂 It's times like those I have to take a deep breath, put on my "professional / diplomatic" voice, and if that fails, say "Screw it" and block them because I'm not sitting here unpaid AND taking their abuse.

NONE of that even encompasses Facebook and its need to constantly change the way things are done.  I feel like I'm always learning and re-learning how to best keep the group going.  It also doesn't take into consideration that there is no easy way for me to take a break from this site even if I need to; I have a responsibility here.  It's honestly a labor of love and sometimes one that takes more than its fair share out of me.  I've been considering for the last few months giving the group over to a shelter or rescue or someone I could trust, but it hasn't happened yet.  We'll see.

Anyway, it's the 10-year birthday of Happy Tails Lost & Found Pets of Calhoun County.  🥳

My power is out.

My power is out. I drove to JSU to get on wifi so that I could attend my online lecture from my car. Unfortunately, we seem to be having some technical issues within Teams. 

The storm kept me awake last night. Lots of limbs fell on the house. I have to check for damage when I get back home. I need to spend my day studying because I'm taking my Differential Equations exam tomorrow.

I'm tired and I don't know when electricity will be restored. This is going to be a super fun day - I can just tell. 🙄

I hope everyone is ok. I've already seen a few sad posts in Happy Tails Lost & Found Pets of Calhoun County. Please help keep an eye out for missing pets. Maybe this day can suck a little less for a few people. ❤️

Today was pretty good.

Today was pretty good.  I woke up early and had my tea, and good conversation with Shaun.  I know I see him and talk to him all the time, but there is nothing like heart-to-heart talks full of reflection and questions and realizations and love.  It's hard to believe we've been together for 12 years.  For 9 years we worked at the same place.  For 8 years I was heavily involved in animal rescue / rehab.  For probably 7 of these years I've struggled with depression (not constantly, but about 7 years ago is when it started).  For 5 years I've been in college.  For two of our years together I struggled greatly with my physical health and psoriatic arthritis.  And there is so much that happened during all of that, too, for better or worse.

I don't know that I have a point with all of that.  I'm just feeling grateful for my best friend / partner in life.  I got an email from JSU recently about graduation regalia, and I think that spurred my thoughts as to how long I'd been working towards graduation and how large of a piece of our relationship school has been.  I know that a job will replace a chunk of my time very soon, but I think that not being tested constantly and actually reaping some of the rewards for my hard work will do me a lot of good - and by extension, Shaun and the kids, as well.  I'm pretty excited about that.

I've been trying to decide all day if I wanted to bother purchasing the cap and gown and all that since it's not likely there will be an actual graduation ceremony (or at least not one I'd feel safe to attend).  I'm also not having professional photos done, but I think it would be nice to have some pictures made with Dinorah at the school, and just have some of myself to mark the occasion.  I can't imagine that I will be nearly as excited without a ceremony; before the pandemic hit I told Shaun I wanted him to make the biggest deal out of graduation for me, but I don't see that being super easy to do as of right now.  That's ok.  I think all of us 2020 graduates probably feel a little cheated, but hey, real life is real life.

Anyway, I am heading to bed.  I have a Differential Equations exam in the morning.  I feel pretty good about it.  We'll see tomorrow if that's real or if it's just the antidepressants talking.  😝  Goodnight, friends!  ❤

I didn't make it out of bed yesterday until 6...

I didn't make it out of bed yesterday until 6.  Six *PM.*  The last couple of days have taken their toll on me.

Faith is the early-riser in the house.  Was, I mean.  ... 🥺

Without her me and Booka can apparently sleep all day.  I'm sure I needed the rest, but yeah.  It's been EXCEPTIONALLY quiet and calm here.  Faith was the busy one.  Had to keep the cats in line.  Had to watch Booka eat.  Had to let us know she was out of water.  Had to go outside to pee often because she was on prednisone.  Always on the lookout for something that needed barking about.

I have gone from fostering dogs (having a max of 14 at one time [to my newer friends - check out my "Foster Kids" album if you really want to know me]) to giving my six amazing, aging forever dogs a break and some well-deserved "us" time, to my one little Booka Bear being the last man standing.  I know that Cubba and Rose live here, but they aren't "my" dogs.  Cubba was meant to be Kira's.  Rose belongs to Cubba.  If I could find either of them a good home they wouldn't be here.  They arrived long after my pack was complete and my heart was full.  I love and care for them, but we're not connected.

I feel guilty because they deserve more, but I can't give it.  I gave so much of myself for so long and I haven't been refilled.  I don't know if setting my focus on school changed me or if the agonizing loss of my pack over the last few years has hindered my capacity to give of myself.  Or it could be the mental breakdowns over the last 5 years and the medications that now hold me together.  I have no idea, but I know I am not the same.

I would still like to volunteer in rescue and foster again one day.  There is nothing like the feeling of helping someone in need; giving freely of yourself, simply CARING.  I've seen animals go from scared and hopeless to enjoying life.  I think that almost anyone can go through the motions (provide food, water, and shelter), but the secret ingredient is connection.  That makes it especially hard to give up an animal to their new forever family, but to me it's necessary for healing.  And I'm unfortunately not sure that I still have the ability to form new connections.  I feel like I've lost a part of myself somewhere along the way.

Forgive me; I'm just over here rambling.  But as I reflect on losing Faith I remember how she came to me - foster failure.  The six best friends of my life came to me during a time that I was open and helpful and connecting to life in a big way - giving and caring and changing lives.  I never searched any of them out and yet the best pack of mismatched mutts I never knew I wanted landed in my home and my heart.  I think I'm scared.  Scared that I'll never have this kind of love again.  Scared that because I'm different right now I don't deserve it.

Friends: If I'm slow...

I hate days that start like this.

I hate days that start like this.  I woke up several hours ago but simply did not have the energy / motivation to take care of all of the animals (because I have to take care of them first before anything else) so I fell back asleep for some hours.  I had to pee really bad the first time I woke up, but I slept through the pain to avoid responsibility.  Now I'm up, but fighting to gather my will to move.

It's not so bad when everyone isn't sick, but when they are... I have to be honest:  It scares me.  I have to remember who needs medication, I have to get it in them (whether it's easy or hard), and sick animals usually mean more messes to clean up.  Of course they are all hungry in the morning so everyone is gathered around bouncing, making noise, and pawing me reminding me not to forget to feed them (because that is something that has ever happened.  😂)

Sometimes the messes (puke or diarrhea, usually) are in what seem to be well-thought out strategic locations to make my life harder.  Like right in the path of where a door opens so I can unknowingly smear said mess everywhere before cleaning it.  Of course while cleaning everyone likes to gather around me to see what interesting thing I'm messing with... while bouncing, making noise, and pawing me because it's obvious that I've forgotten to feed them somehow.

I don't have school today so I have a list of things I wanted to get done around the house.  But here I sit - having accomplished only taking myself to the bathroom to pee.  The kids are texting with requests and I'm here replying that they can handle things themselves because I am great.  I am already hours behind on everything - even some really important stuff - and I just CAN'T with all that.

This is why I've not been taking in more animals.  I do have one foster dog; I've had him since about October.  He's a great guy and we were planning to keep him, but I see more and more that it is not going to work.  He deserves better than the life we can offer him right now.  On my list of things to do today was to get some nice photos of him and begin my search for a rescue.  I am just tapped out.  I am scraping the bottom of the barrel on what I have left to give.

I try not to speak for Shaun, but I can tell that he is struggling, too.  We both need more time and space for self-care.  He's barely able to drag himself to work.  Honestly, I don't even know when he last went to trivia with his friends - which used to be a weekly thing.  This is not ok.  Along that vein we need time and space to be a couple.  We went to dinner at Ruby Tuesday the other night because we just had to.  It was really nice to sit across from him and just SEE his face.  We needed it.

Y'all, I have been a mom for more than half of my life now.  I have kept a hoard of forever animals for the last 13-ish years, and I have fostered animals and volunteered in rescue for about 11 years.  The kids are grown and my animals are dying off.  I'm happy about the kids, heartsick about my animals, and basically tapped out.  I need some major "me" time.  I want to focus on school and my future career.  I want more time for my HUSBANG.  I wish I knew how to make any of this happen, but I don't.

Anyway.  The animals are calling.  Guess I'm off to stop "neglecting" them.

Over the last few days my sanity has taken a hit.

Over the last few days my sanity has taken a hit.

We frankened a working pet gate from two older pet gates.  The one that was taller is the one we ended up using.  Unfortunately, it was covered in Nappy's "nose art" and had to be cleaned.  I felt like I just washed the last piece of her out of my life.  🙁

Midna (my 10 year old cat) is very sick.  She's had runny poop for years, but no one could find anything wrong with her.  She was otherwise healthy; the only real downside is that she sometimes didn't make it to the litter box.  Over the last few days she lost her appetite and was just leaking diarrhea constantly and I assumed that she was having a final downturn.  I took her to the vet fully expecting that they would tell me there is nothing left to be done for her, but she's on medication and now my hopes are up.  I guess I don't get a break from rollercoaster emotions right now.

I had a salad with pickles last night.  I realized as I cut the pickle skins off that Emma wasn't there to eat them for me.  She always loved pickle skins.  That was a punch to the heart, as well.

I've been lazy for days and just finally loaded the dishwasher.  Among all of our used dishes were the dishes we used to try to nurse Bun back to health.  Ouch.

Of course the weather was stressful and I'm just now realizing the extent of the damage at JSU.  I am in panic mode.  I don't mean to sound selfish, but what does this mean for us - the students?  Will my degree be delayed?  Will we finish this semester?  I am positively petrified.

And of course my Facebook is blowing up with Happy Tails Lost & Found Pets of Calhoun County requests and posts needing approval.  It is such a sad day.  I hope everyone finds their loved ones safe and sound.

I hope you all are doing well.  I have been mostly ok, but today I am not.  I'm off to clean my house and immerse myself in homework so that I can feel I have a semblance of control over something.

It's been about two weeks since I last posted...

I have about a week left before I start back to school. My last post had an optimistic tone; yet I have done almost nothing but sleep since I wrote it. The only real thing I've managed to do was get through the holidays and Google some stuff. My research has led me to this conclusion:  I am probably in the midst of a mid-life crisis. Hear me out.

At the end of 2014 I was diagnosed with Psoriatic Arthritis. It was at that point that I stopped and took a good, hard look at my life. I could see that I was on the down-hill slide (health-wise). I knew I was not living up to my potential. I was stagnate (career-wise). I didn't have any money saved, I had no retirement plans, and if there were any emergencies I didn't have a way to get through them without getting farther behind. So I did something drastic (and thankfully it was positive):  I went back to college.

During 2015 I worked and went to school. I felt as optimistic as I could despite struggling with my physical health. That was the year I couldn't walk up or down stairs by myself. Most of the medications I was put on didn't help - or if they did, left me with pretty bad side effects. Fortunately (or unfortunately, I don't know), by the time I saw a rheumatologist that November my symptoms were under control enough that he didn't want to change my medication. Then I lost my insurance... so you know - that was great.

I started off 2016 uninsured and a little heavier than I was used to being because I'd hurt so much during 2015 that I became much less active. I tried to take it easy on myself, but being in college and around so many young, healthy people... well, even though I've never been one to focus on my looks I gotta say that my self-esteem was starting to take a hit. Not only that, but my hobbies were starting to slip away. I wasn't making jewelry anymore, I was doing my nails less, and I wasn't taking in as many animals. Then, 2016 kicked me while I was down. Dad's house burned, killed his pets, took almost everything he had. I lost Lowrider and Scooter, as well as some of the smaller ani-pals. A pipe burst in my house and it flooded. You know - all that good stuff. Enter antidepressants.

Then 2017 rolled around. Hard classes:  Physics, Calculus II. I questioned so many times if I should keep going because that shit was kicking my ass. Shaun lost his mom. My bones hurt and my skin flared - I suffered through it because I had no insurance and all I could get for medication was methotrexate (whose side effects are worse than my disease). My neighbor stole my power and water - super stressful. I was barely working at that point because school was taking so much out of me, so that was the last damn thing I needed. My nails were a mess - no time for hobbies. Self-care went down the toilet. The only thing I had to look forward to was JSU.

Made that transition - it was harder than I expected. The adjustment from one college to the other was rough. New place, new teachers, and only one person I knew. Classes were tough and took a lot out of me. I left a job I'd worked for 9 years to focus on school - yet another huge transition. Beyonce died. Emma died. Tasha died. I died inside. I melted down at school. I dropped a class. I made my first C. More transition - Shadow moved in with Shaun to gain a little independence and so Kira could have his room. Tragedy struck Kira's family. No self-care; my life was upside down and I was hanging by a thread. I didn't know who I was anymore. Felt like antidepressants couldn't save me now.

So this is where I am right now. I don't look like the Blu I remember. I don't feel like the Blu I remember. I don't work where the Blu I remember worked. I don't do the things that the Blu I remember used to do. Not that I have ever been the most outgoing, but I barely talk to my friends anymore, I don't seem to go anywhere besides school, and I don't do nails or take in animals or give back to the community. Even right now I'd choose cinnamon rolls over chocolate. I don't know who I am anymore. I've lost myself. I've lost a lot in the past two years. It sucks.

What's even worse is that more transition is coming. The kids are both having major anxiety and depression over graduating high school in a few months. I generally recall that as being a very happy and exciting time of life, but honestly, none of the seniors at Saks seem pumped. They all seem worried about their future and that is the saddest thing. Shaun and I both constantly reassure Kira and Shadow that they don't have to move out or anything like that - we just want them to make some good life decisions about their futures. Still, they are struggling, too, and it hurts my heart.

So now what? I would LOVE to pretend that I've had enough bad shit happen that I get to be ok in 2018, but realistically I know that is not how life works. Fortunately (unfortunately?) I have a lot left to lose - even though I might have by and large lost sight of that in the midst of everything that has happened.

 
In any case I still don't know when or how I'm going to be ok. I don't know how I'm going to get through this semester with as tired and unmotivated as I've been. I still have no idea who I'm becoming because I'm sure not the person I remember being. I don't really know what to do with myself besides stay the course I started and try to finish school. I would really hate to crap out now that I am more than half-way done, but I am having some serious anxiety about school and about working after I graduate. I don't know. The only hope I have is that from everything I've read after the mid-life crisis (which is where you sort of bottom out), your happiness generally increases until you die so that is something to look forward to.

I'm really sorry for this drawn-out, downer of a post, but I really needed to get this out. As far as I know none of my friends have gone through this yet so I feel pretty alone. I know that I am generally on the young side for this to be happening, but I did have Shadow earlier than most people have kids so it would make sense since my boy is just 3 months shy of being 18. If anyone out there has advice for me feel free to share. Otherwise, I'm planning to step up my self-care a lot and just hang in there. I am going to see a therapist at JSU once classes start back and since I have a big break between some of my classes I'm going to try to take advantage of some of their free fitness classes. I did notice a boost in my overall well-being from having to walk so much so surely it will help if I can get a little more exercise in.

I hope you all are doing well. I'm not, yet, but I'm going to keep trying. That is all any of us can do.  🤎🤎🤎

I'm finally starting to feel like I might not have an elephant on my chest...

I'm finally starting to feel like I might not have an elephant on my chest and I'm thankful for that.  My mood has been up and down, but if it will stabilize somewhere in the middle I'll be ok ("ok" meaning that I'm not hiding from the world on my couch or in my bed, and with enough energy to kind of function like a human).

Friday the post man recognized my name and asked if I was the one who runs Happy Tails Lost & Found Pets of Calhoun County.  I felt slightly famous.  LOL  He told me that the group had helped someone he knew, so that made my day.  🙂

As for today, we're doing Kira's nails.  I did the base and they look pretty awesome - if I do say so myself.  She's getting really good at stamping, so she's going to finish them off with that part herself in a little while.  If I can get up the energy I might do mine, too, but they are not in great shape anymore because I've severely neglected them this semester.  🙁

Anyway, I'm finally starting to feel like I'm on the mend.  It's unfortunate that it has taken so long because we have a ton to do this week, but better late than never, I suppose.  I hope you all are doing well.  ❤

Today reinforced my belief that people are crap.

Today reinforced my belief that people are crap. Not all of you, but definitely a lot of you.

I can't tell you how many times I've been harassed by people from Happy Tails because they break the rules and I ask them not to. I had to block someone today, and then she sent her friend after me.

Literally a month ago I was dealing with this same person's mother. The mom was mad that I didn't approve her post bashing a vet clinic, so she came to my personal page and started commenting. Then she had the nerve to tell me to leave her alone! Her daughter tried to pull the same crap this morning, threatening to report me for harassment. I said my peace and blocked her. That's when she sent her friend, but I'm totally the one doing the harassing.

I don't get it. Why do people think they are special and above the rules? How does anyone get so entitled? And why is it that when these people are in the wrong they lose all control and sink to attacking someone's character, or better yet, name-calling? I guess because they have no other defense. But still, it's annoying to death and it blows my mind. Believe it or not I don't wake up every day looking for someone to fight.

Me and the kid are in the floor with a shaking, cowering pile of dogs.

Me and the kid are in the floor with a shaking, cowering pile of dogs.  I'm on Facebook, rapidly approving lost and found posts in Happy Tails Lost & Found Pets of Calhoun County.  This is how we spend Fourth of July.

If you have pets and haven't yet secured them and assured their safety - please do it now if they haven't run away in terror.  If you can't find them, post them ASAP.  We have just shy of 5000 members in the local area so maybe your fur-child can be found before it's run over by a car.  Don't mean to be a damper on everyone's party, but seriously - take care of the innocents in your charge - this evening and always.

Thank you.

You know the days when...

You know the days when you have lots of errands to run and have a thousand things to do and it exhausts you and drains your life force?  That's been my whole year so far.

I had been looking super forward to my 3 weeks off from school, but instead of having any down-time, I took an extra job because I needed to.  I have to start back tutoring tomorrow - which I'm honestly not looking forward to.  Classes have started so now there's that.  Storm is being adopted so there are appointments to be made and a list of things to make sure I've done.  And I'm just tired.

I feel like a shit friend, but I have a lot on my plate.  I have messages piling up and I have no intentions of answering them right now - maybe not even for some days.  I feel like I am being pulled a million directions and I'm just done.  I love you all, but I need some space. I can't solve problems and I'm not interested in conversing right now.  I just can't.  I don't have it in me and I just can't.

I hope that anyone who is trying to talk to me will understand.  I'm turning notifications for Messenger off for a while.  I will probably still show as "Active" pretty often because that's mainly how I talk to Shaun and Shadow, but unless something urgent comes up please don't expect a reply.  I keep notifications off for the Facebook app, but I will check in because I have to approve posts for Happy Tails Lost & Found Pets of Calhoun County.  Other than that I'll start talking when I feel like I can.

It's not personal.  I love you all.  See you on the other side.  ❤

Busy busy day today.

Busy busy day today.  Just wow.  I'm exhausted, but I'm about to have to get ready for class!

I took Storm to have his ears checked.  I tried to swab them myself, but he was NOT having it.  😂  The vet had to muzzle him and someone had to hold onto him and he growled the whole time.  Bad boy!  😂😂😂  He was otherwise super sweet and good, though.  He politely greeted everyone who entered the vet's office and was well-behaved.  He still has a little bit of yeast in his ears, but we have meds and we'll get him worked out tomorrow.  Shaun is still at work today and I'm about to leave... and there is no way for me to flush and medicate that boy's ears by myself.

Other than that I did talk to my biology teacher briefly today.  She said that she thinks I'll make a B in her class, if not an A.  😳  I was shocked, but we do have some points left to get and so I'm going to give it my all.  I've got a high B in Trig and an A in History so I'm otherwise doing ok.  Phew!

I also saw my adviser today and I really had no idea, but it's entirely possible that I'll be ready to graduate at the end of this year.  😳  Whattt?!  We have summer planned and a good idea of what I need to take in the fall.  If GSCC offers Calculus II in the Spring next year then I'll stay there for that and my last elective.  And if they don't - well, I'll throw my last elective onto fall and call it done.  Since I haven't taken many computer classes yet, I'll graduate with an Associates of Science with a concentration in Mathematics.  Geez, that sounds fancy!  😲😂

Anyway, one last thing before I go:  Dad was supposed to be getting his mobile home moved today.  I haven't talked to him yet, but I'll text him soon.  I hope he did and that it went smoothly.  Maybe I'll get to see him this weekend in his new place.  Super thank you to everyone who has helped us during all of this.  It's really the worst and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.  ❤

Getting ready for work.

Getting ready for work.  Today is not as bad as yesterday.  Physically, anyway.  Emotionally, well - that's another story.  Some jackass in my Happy Tails Pet Recovery of Calhoun County group had me livid and in tears at 7:30 this morning.  I hope Keith Timmons feels great about that.  As if it's not bad enough that I was cussed up one side and down the other as well as insulted (on my page AND via PM) by another person in the group last night.  Oh, and now Keith is sending me messages, too.  People just can't get enough.

The rules there are simple:  Post lost and founds only - for the sole purpose of reuniting pets with their owners.  I don't know why some people can't understand that.  It's not complicated.

Anyway.  I was blamed for more people not helping animals because I am "extreme."  No.  The reason that more people don't help is because people are ignorant and lazy and irresponsible and they don't feel any obligation whatsoever to make even a small change in the way they do things for the greater good.

So there's that, but then also the fact that rescue people BURN OUT. That can be attributed to usually one or two things:  1)  It is psychologically damaging to a person for them to witness pain and suffering on a continuous basis.  It's called secondary-traumatic stress disorder and it's a real thing.  It causes depression and suicide.

So not only is there THAT, but there is a big # 2), which is:  There are the people who make life hard for rescue people.  Such as harassing and cursing them when they do something that the person doesn't like.  Rescue people who have been doing this for a while have rules in place for a reason and do things the way they do FOR A REASON.  I'm terribly sorry if rescue is not your thing and you don't understand, but I literally don't have time to explain myself repeatedly.  If you have a question - ask it - and I'm more than happy to answer... but arguing with me because you don't like how I do things and insulting me gets you nowhere.

So NO - I am not the reason that anyone chooses not to rescue or help animals and anyone who thinks that is a dumbass.  People who truly want to help WILL FIND A WAY.

I just bawled my way through English class.

OMD.  I just bawled my way through English class. 😂 We had to write a descriptive essay about a day. Man, I have lots of things I could describe, but a great many of my stories are gross or sad. I ended up writing about the day I found Dahlia. 

For those who don't remember - this was Dahlia when I found her. 

THE FEELS. 😳

Took the doggie meds by the business today.

Took the doggie meds by the business today. The man said he hasn't seen the mangy dog in a while, but that his friend lives near the dog so he'll pass them along. I left him my name and number in case they need anything else. Maybe they'll call and let me know how he's doing. If I find out anything, I'll be sure to post it here. 🙂