This is my first full week of having a hybrid schedule.

This is my first full week of having a hybrid schedule.  It has been amazing.

I already knew that I loved working from home from previous jobs; I am so much more productive when I am able to be comfortable.  Being short-statured, no chair or desk is built for me.  If I'm high up enough to type comfortably, my feet are dangling.  If my feet aren't dangling, my arms are awkwardly high up trying to type and mouse.  I do have a foot rest at the office, which helps - but only if I'm sitting on the edge of my chair.  At home, I can sit however I need to in order to be comfortable.  I'm often criss-cross or sitting with my legs propped straight out.

Aside from the weird-sitting situation, I also struggle with temperature regulation.  I'm usually cold, even when others are quite warm.  So when I work from home I usually have a blanket on my lap.  I often wear a hat, or a hoodie so that I can cover my head.  When I'm in-office I want to look more professional, so I don't do any of those things - at least not without feeling self-conscious.  There have been some times that I put a hat on because I just couldn't focus otherwise due to being so cold.  Doing my best work wins over how goofy I look every time, but it's nice not to have to worry about that.

Thankfully, I have discovered my professional style that doesn't feel like a costume, and generally I am decently comfortable in my work clothes.  However, my temperature regulation settings suck and I still sweat even when I'm cold... even through layers.  So I constantly feel self-conscious and worry that people will see my armpit wet spots and feel grossed out.  I do have an appointment to hopefully address that in a couple of weeks, but for now it's much easier to just be a sweaty mess on my home days and not worry about it.

Overall, it's just easier to work from home.  Despite Shaun and the kids and the pets, I feel like I have fewer distractions and can be more productive.

The thing is, I enjoy my office days, too.

I love the drive - it's beautiful and despite the traffic, fun.  I love being here and feeling like I'm here.  I love having access to people that I have so much in common with.  I am a somewhat social creature, so it feels great to see my teammates in person.  At my previous job, all of my coworkers were scattered.  After the training period ended and I returned home to work I was fully remote; I basically only had access to them via Slack.  I felt pretty isolated.

So, this first week of hybrid has felt pretty great.  I feel more balanced.  I feel less exhausted.  I'm saving 8 hours of driving per week, which is basically a whole day.  As much as I love to drive, that is a bit much.  I would definitely do it if I had to because I love this job, but it's nice to not have to.

Speaking of loving the job... I am very engaged in my work.  I feel like it's making an impact.  It's challenging and fun.  It's nice to be contracted with one organization where I can see the benefit of what I've built, versus having 2 or 3 smaller projects for different companies where after I complete my task, the company moves me onto something else and I never see how my work has helped make a difference.

Also, being medicated for ADHD is a big help.  I can focus better.  I feel less overwhelmed in general, despite still having quite a lot of things to take care of.  I'm not just getting through my tasks; I'm learning from them.  I'm taking better care of myself.  I'm able to wake up in the mornings and stay awake all day because I'm now able to fall asleep at night, and STAY asleep.  Even when I was forcing myself to stay awake during the day, my brain obviously wasn't functioning at it's best no matter how hard I tried.  I'm no longer functioning on adrenaline; I don't have to anymore.  I can know that a thing needs to be done and instead of dreading it and putting it off until right before the deadline I can either do it or make a plan to do it, and stick to that.  It's wonderful.

I am very optimistic about the future.  I hope it's not speaking too soon, but I do feel like part of a team now.  I can see myself growing in my current position.  It's very exciting, and such a relief to not have to fight tooth and nail for every little win.

Sorry for the ramble, but I am feeling so grateful.  I just had to put it out there.